Military Review

It was a guard

4
In the fire training battalion, where I served, one of the detachments was a guard for the protection of DOS (Dalny Armory Warehouses). Being not admitted to the guard, I did not go to it during training. But in the off-season, the trained ones had already left and the newcomers had not arrived yet, they rowed everyone in these outfits. The main thing is not to fuck and know how to hold a weapon. Checks came as expected and knowing that the "serzhanskiy" guard was not particularly chased by the introductory guard, especially the regimental ones.


And he was also in the battalion of the NS. Man's strict but fair. We were afraid and respected. He was very demanding of himself and even more so of his subordinates. He also has many stories if he succeeds in telling him later.

But this is all a preamble, so to speak. And now история.

A call to the guardhouse from one of the posts came as a surprise. The more in 12 nights. Nachkar is asleep, I sit on the console and read as an assistant. Almost everyone is asleep, except for two dividing dominoes and lazily watching TVs. and everything seems to be quiet. So who does it bother?

The guard is experienced, there are no fools, stand on the 2 tower for an hour and lilyu.Hochesh "pipi" - please from the tower (you can not of course, but if you want, you can), if you want to smoke, smoke quietly (just skit in the tower and go further for the thorn). In short, in perplexity I pick up the phone:
- Nehru do, right? What are you calling?
- The attack on the post from the side of the forest. One violator. The voice of the sentry is slightly trembling but speaks confidently.
"Cheeeevo? What is sick or what? What is the violator? We are in the middle of the forest. What snag is it?"
-Not, just like a man of some kind. I screamed at him, but he still came up to the thorn and said something. I’ll shoot at the warning now. And yet, that is, he is actually a KNIGHT WITH A SWORD.

Well, everything is clear-puffed, crud, watch drapa. Well, only they lit, well, how he contrived. Suka. Let us remove the snout from the post itself (but it seems after nachkar). Then take all the chantrope into guard. Then they will pick them up from the warehouses, from the parks, and from the canteens of the cooks, and you suffer with them. quickly. Starley is not a fool, he immediately guesses everything — a cigarette with a machine gun on the post, the dick knows what is in his head and for whom he will begin to move. If he already had glitches, we saw him well.

“You are not the main fighter to shoot,” Nachkar soothes by phone — we are already running out.
The guard at the gun, ran to repel the "attack on the post." I stayed in the guardhouse for the nachkar. After half an hour of waiting, the group returned with cheerful hacks. Further, with the words of nachkar.
“And the fighter then turned out to be normal. I’m not looking after the post. I’m really looking behind the thorny silhouette of a man. And on it in the moonlight pereilyatsya KOLCHUGA AND LATA. And on the side of the belt SWORD. he cautiously sneaks up on him so much. The fighter from the tower cheeps then shouts, but he has a lot of thoughts in his head. How is that possible? I also remembered fiction about the time machine and the French movie and ghosts. But common sense took over.
“What do you want, man?” I ask.
- Friend, me ... this ... light bulb on a flashlight ... maybe ... this ... there is ... you ... My burned down ..
"Sho? Are you a boob boob?" Who are you at all? How are you here?
I walk up to him on the sly. Can there be a little podka.A and from him the bayoner for the 2 meter. Well, definitely with booze.
- Yes, not ... I just have a light bulb and I will go, - Teteon turns the tongue around.
Then two more come out of the forest. Seeing us, one of them, the most sober, quickly grasps everything.
- Bone, bitch, you fucked up here. There are signs everywhere that the object is guarded. Men are already there. - let go of the fool. He didn’t serve, he didn’t see the plate drunk.

In general, the Tolkinists, 300 man, staged a meeting in 30 meters from Kaliuchi in the forest. Well, that is, fans of John Ronald Reuel Tolkien, author of The Lord of the Rings. Bonfires are blazing there, they are fighting for fun with swords, they read their books. They have a couple there and there are a couple of "fairies." They are having fun in shorter time. and seeing the light on the tower went out on her. Friends rushed to look for and voices came on us. That's the whole story. "

Telling them, the nachkar and the fighters choked with laughter. The story overgrown with the additions of the fighters and became even funnier. Rest assured, the old men gathered everyone and told no one about the incident not to tell. They did not write anything to the guard.
But this is not the end. Now, the aforementioned chief of staff of the battalion enters the plot.

At about 6.30 in the morning I went out to smoke outside the smoking room. I just lit a lamp and turned the NS on a bicycle from a passing asphalt road to us. Meters for 100 started yelling to open the gate locked at the guard yard. The soldier at the guardhouse "doggie" is going to report on the arrived inspection (as it should be) to the narkar.

-What report, warrior, open immediately. I order.
Seeing my familiar face, the captain yells to me:
- Sergeant, the door opened, quickly.

I am going to open the door, send the fighter "to cut the chip" to the old man. I’m looking for the right key for a long time, I’m pulling the time until the master wakes up. I notice the slightly confused and frightened look of the cap. He constantly looks back on the road. wet and he himself was breathless. The lieutenant stepped out, held him on guard, gave tea. Captain looked through the papers, caught his breath.

-Let's go, Starley.

They went out into the smoking room and the NSH began something quietly and animatedly telling nkkaru. Skurav a couple of cigarettes, the captain went out, sat down on a big one and drove towards the side, looking around.

And this, as it turned out, was a rather brave act on his part. Having walked to the checker's gate, Starley entered the guardhouse, closed the door, raised his head. We saw red tears from the eyes and tears rolling from the eyes. After a second, he broke. He fell on the couch and covered himself with a pillow of 5 RZHAL minutes. looking at him, too, giggled. Several times he calmed down, tried to tell something, but once again covered him. After 15 minutes, somehow, having calmed down under our chuckles, he instructed the upcoming shift to go to his couch, lay down, turned his back on me. In the twitching back, I realized that he was hysterical again with laughter.

What the NS told nkkara was a mystery for us for a long time. He didn’t tell us anything. And he did it right. This is not a comradely and not ethical. But much later I learned the truth through one familiar captain.

Returning from the landfill, where he checked the outfit, the NS was driving toward DOSov. In the forest silence behind him, he heard a measured tramp. Looking back through the morning haze, he was catching up with the SWICKER KNIGHT WITH THE SPEAKER ON THE HORSE. he looked around, and the rest of the way to the guardhouse drove with acceleration. He didn’t know how long he drove for miles and kilometers, but the knight began to fall behind. and not with Cazal about Tolkienists.

This is the story that happened to me on guard. I just read the stories here and began to understand that I have something to tell. If I like it again, Thank you for your attention.
Originator:
http://bayki.odnopolchan.net/tale461
4 comments
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  1. makarov
    makarov 6 November 2013 08: 58
    +3
    good storytelling. thanks to the author.
  2. pensioner
    pensioner 6 November 2013 10: 09
    +3
    If you like some more food. Thank you for your attention.

    Be sure to write! I look forward to it. Thanks for today. The mood rose well, otherwise I’ve been from yesterday ...
    1. Military79
      7 November 2013 03: 38
      0
      For you one more bike. It is good when the mood rises.
  3. npv554f
    npv554f 12 November 2013 12: 35
    0
    To the author plus with plus. And it is desirable to continue the "banquet".
    1. Military79
      17 November 2013 16: 22
      0
      I print my stories from another site, but I don’t provide a name. And the admin, apparently, considers this plagiarism and does not print them.
  4. demon71
    demon71 5 December 2013 14: 55
    0
    The story is super! Ugral! Something similar was also in our service. Only this happened to some official from Moscow, who came to check type. Only he tore the claws from the she-wolf that we had tamed ..... We then had such Istria was !!!!!!