Likbez for the "orange" revolutionaries



If you open the textbook world stories on the flyleaf, where significant dates are usually collected in one table, then a maximum of five to six revolutions can be seen on 100 years. You can envy those authors who will write a history textbook for 2010-11 years. So many revolutions and coups, perhaps, did not know any historical era, if you do not take, of course, the history of Latin America. Only in the case of Latin America 19-th century, the struggle was for independence from external domination (Spanish), and the current revolution refers to a new class of "orange" (or "color"), when revolutionaries beat their own, so that others were afraid. Moreover, the recipe for modern revolutions is quite simple, so much so that they can be used in almost every corner of the world. So, on what are the modern coups mixed up? If we talk about the recipe, it is approximately as follows.


To begin with, in a certain country of our planet there must necessarily be a handful (maybe even a very small) of people who are dissatisfied with something. Even if the country is successful enough, then you can still find the discontented. Someone doesn’t like the level of salary, someone doesn’t like the color of their Lexus, and the Lexus of a different color doesn’t give a lift, someone cannot see how many tourists trample their land, someone is not happy that the portrait of the country's leader on his wall has already begun to fade, and the leader still does not want to change.
Next, the disgruntled ones should try to gather at one time in one place and immediately send correspondents of the Western media to this place. It is better to collect, of course, through social networks or SMS-messages. So it comes to the modern person faster, because he does not part with his mobile phone even in the toilet. If the disgruntled is a Muslim, then in the text of the message you can indicate that again some scoundrel portrayed the wrong angle of the Prophet Muhammad and that it is necessary to urgently run to the central city square, taking with him all the most necessary things. If the disgruntled is an atheist, then in the message one can indicate that the country is going to adopt a law on the forced Christianization (Islamization, Judaization) of all atheists. In general, the text should lead a person into a frenzy and call for urgent action.

While the disgruntled will be collected, you can smear your head with ketchup and give an interview to one of the British or American news channels. It’s not at all necessary to talk a lot here, the main thing is that there were words in broken English like “free”, “demokrasi” or “people revolution”, as well as a few words in their own language in the spirit of “we need new power” or something same way. Smart correspondents will make high-quality cutting and bring to the audience the words as they need.

At the same time, dissatisfied need to hand posters with appeals. Calls must be written, naturally, by hand. Among other words, the same “Freedom” and “Democracy” must be met. We must not forget that 99% of posters should be exclusively with English text, so that those for whom all porridge is brewed, see that the people are not asleep. Among the protesters must be children. They can be taken from their own homes, but it is better to use the services of those for whom the street has become a home. They are much better suited as oppressed. Such children should have a colorful toothpaste on their face to draw a revolutionary banner, and give a small poster in their hands with the words “I haven't eaten for two weeks!”

In order for those gathered not to disperse after fifteen minutes, realizing that they were inflated, you need to stock up on money, tents, flags, thematic newspapers and plenty of food. Some experts on orange revolutions recommend the use of alcohol. From him, as they say, the protest is more natural.

You can take the bust of Karl Marx with you or wear a T-shirt with the image of Che Guevara. We must not forget that the action is broadcast on the most advanced and democratic states of the world. Therefore, you need to pick up bright places for meetings. It would not be superfluous if the revolution was mixed up not far from government buildings. In this case, you need to prepare a group of people who will have to throw stones and empty bottles at the police. Such "heated" revolutionaries will always be found. It will be just great for the transition of the revolutionary movement to a new phase, if the police begin to detain the protesters. It also happens that the police are not in a hurry to take retaliatory measures, then the initiative must be taken into their own hands: spray a dozen or so cans of spray gas over the square. At the same time, closing his eyes full of tears, his hands, you need to remember to cry out to the camera that the police are against the people and are already using force against peaceful demonstrators.

A particularly successful revolutionary move can be the following: two or three participants in the “revolution” disguised as policemen should approach the CNN cell and say that they have just gone over to the side of the protesters. It is better, of course, to use the word "rebels" or "freedom fighters" in their speech. Such words make an indelible impression on the western audience.

The main thing is to hold out for several days, after which zeal can be rewarded, and long-awaited NATO bombers will appear in the sky ...
Author:
Alexey Volodin
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