Military Review

Ukraine is the country of the future


Sorry for the uneven handwriting, I write on the tablet, which jumps from the hryvnia exchange rate. More precisely, constantly failing. So, the news of holding the long-awaited early elections of the damned, fully corrupt Rada was greeted with tears of gratitude in his eyes. The situation in the country and beyond, which still have slightly vague outlines, has stabilized sharply. The already mentioned (not the night) national currency continues to delight with its exquisite peak, steadily approaching the “15” mark.

As for me, there is no sense in high-profile headlines like "Hryvnia beat another historical minimum". She does it regularly, every day. Everyone is happy, admiringly watching the change of numbers at gas stations and congratulating each other with approaching European standards. “If this goes on, then soon gasoline will be more expensive than in their European Union,” rubbing his hands dirty, says refueling Nikolai, who readily comments on the pricing policy of oil companies using scientific terms such as “ass”, "P ... c", "shit." But in general, he is positive and fully endorses the policies of the president, Arseniy Yatsenyuk in general, and the head of the NBU in particular.

The head of the National Bank, of which it is only known that she is a natural blonde, is not optimistic about the latest record results of currency trading on the interbank market. This gives hope for speedy stabilization of the course and growth of the well-being of ordinary citizens in the near future, marked by the dates of “born-died”. The old-timers of the interbank market remember how she single-handedly strengthened the hryvnia rate by eight kopecks with the help of the interesting word volatiamnost. In this regard, everyone is confident that the nation is consolidating at an unprecedented pace, as evidenced by the growing number of blue and yellow paint being sold, as well as the constant increase in the number of citizens wishing to vote for the first leader in Ukraine with unconventional orientation Oleg Lyashko. Many are confident that in the future composition of the Verkhovna Rada, Oleg's political force, in the name of which there is a particle “feces”, will form a stable parliamentary majority, and those who are called today a minority will automatically become “Bolsheviks”.

Once again I would like to thank the party and the government for the early parliamentary elections. It's just like the light at the end of a long tunnel, illuminating the sign "Don't get in, bitch, kill!" Things are getting better. The optimistic mood of voters is felt at every corner. Their attitude is conveyed to the ATO press service, which never ceases to please us with the outstanding achievements of the Ukrainian troops in dismembering Russian tank columns. "Dismembered" goes in a continuous stream. Right in the morning, without even drinking their morning coffee, the NSDC speakers managed to deal with the armored column of the RF Ministry of Defense, in which there were over a hundred vehicles. Particular attention was paid to the fact that some runic symbols in the form of white circles, as well as mysterious triangles of an unknown color, were applied to tanks and other armored vehicles of the enemy. However, this did not prevent the use of high-precision weapons destroy Russian saboteurs. They had passports of citizens of the Russian Federation, certificates of saboteurs, extracts from the orders on the treacherous attack on the territory of Ukraine, as well as a photo of Vladimir Putin in his youth.

Tactical regrouping of ATO forces continues successfully. Our troops have already reached the outskirts of Rostov and, according to adviser to the Minister Arsen Avakov with the name Shkiryak, they are conducting quarterly clearance of this settlement. The fact that the Russians do not see them is a problem for the Russians. Once again, Ilovaisk was taken, which this time stormed from twelve sides. As a result, ninety percent of this settlement is under the control of volunteer battalions, and in general, the Ukrainian army owns the left half of Ilovaisk, so the battles are on the outskirts. The ATO forces successfully repel attacks in the forest plantation, the situation remains stable. Saur-Tomb is under the personal control of Tymchuk. Dmitry regularly refutes information about her capture by the militia and reflects up to ten attacks of brutal Russian troops per hour. Sometimes more. How to go. Everyone in the ATO zone is confident that the elections in the Donetsk and Lugansk regions will be free and democratic, so they are doing everything possible to repel Russian aggression, concentrating significant forces in the Mariupol region. This tactical move is designed to drive the enemy crazy, which will inevitably fall into the trap near Kharkov.

As analysts predicted, the negotiations in Minsk became a major diplomatic victory for Kiev. No wonder that the supreme commander modestly stated that at meetings with his participation the fate of the entire observable world is decided.

Mars was pretty quickly resolved by everyone, but with Jupiter, certain disagreements arose over Putin’s stupid position. However, a breakthrough was achieved. Everyone at the mini-summit with the participation of a woman who refutes the man’s descent from a monkey and suggests horses was the only one to discuss the peace plan of the commander-in-chief in the southeast. “Where does he get such a wonderful, peaceful plan ?!”, the attendees admired. Even the Asian Nazarbayev, in whose possessions a lot of legendary things grow, was forced to recognize the superiority of Kiev in this matter. The only moment that nearly overshadowed the monstrous geopolitical success of Ukraine is the handshake between Putin and Peter Alekseyevich. There was a stormy discussion on Twitter, and everyone came to a consensus that Poroshenko should spit in the shiny Kremlin sky, then to sing the anthem of Ukraine in a well-placed voice. Unfortunately, hopes were not justified. But the commander-in-chief changed so greatly in the face at the time of physical contact with Putin that this reincarnation aroused the delight of all users of social networks. It was an unsurpassed masterpiece of acting. One cannot look without a shudder at the art of true reincarnation. Even Catherine Ashton was frightened and looked around for a suitable shelter. But the toilet was far away, so I had to restrain the urge by a monstrous effort of European will.

All Ukrainian people, however, supported the outcome of the Minsk Summit, as it was necessary for the consolidation of the nation. No wonder that all of Kiev was painted in yellow-blakytny color. Logic catch? Not? And she is.

And finally, I will talk about the mysterious events that occurred at a meeting of the political council of the Batkivshchyna party. A collective, I would even say, demonstrative demarche took place there. Whole 16 members of this legendary association left Yulia Tymoshenko, thus demonstrating the steady will to consolidate the already mentioned nation. These events fit into the ATO's winning logic. Arseny Yatsenyuk, Oleksandr Turchynov, Arsen Avakov, other members of the government made Tymoshenko clearly understand that, in their opinion, she was not satisfied with their presentation of racial harmony. To be honest, I am outraged by this anti-gender approach. She, them, blah, in a garbage dump found, picked up, warmed, led out to people. And now these people "figvamy" draw her. Moreover, Arsen Avakov called Yulia Vladimirovna a “former partner” and hinted that he should remain “friends”. It seems to me that such an attitude towards a woman is not permissible. Now Tymoshenko is de facto the only official opposition to the supreme commander.

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  1. parusnik
    parusnik 28 August 2014 07: 43
    Moreover, Arsen Avakov called Yulia Vladimirovna “a former partner” and hinted that one should remain “friends”..... They marred and left ...
    1. serega.fedotov
      serega.fedotov 28 August 2014 08: 45
      Cyborg Yulia herself can “sail away” Avakov! Only for Maidan, victory in the elections is unnecessary! On the contrary, you need to blow it out and then shout about falsifications, and then about inflation, lack of light, mountains of troupes of ATO forces, and T, D. Good luck to Yulka after new Maidan and Crimea will grow, and novorosia will grow MUCH!
  2. Andrey Yuryevich
    Andrey Yuryevich 28 August 2014 07: 43
    The mind of Russia does not understand what is happening in Ukraine
    (not Tyutchev ...) lol
  3. vrach
    vrach 28 August 2014 07: 44
    Once again, I want to find a sense in what is happening.
    In 2004, when the first Maidan was the yearning for Europe was somehow justified, there really were shaneshki bigger and tastier, in 2013-14 after the financial crisis of 2008. and the economic and political upsurge of Russia, this already had absolutely no significance, there was an equalization of living standards of the East and West, in any case, the standard of living in Russia became higher than in Portugal and Greece. In fact, what is happening now is an attempt to get into yesterday, precisely from Ukraine.
    They do not at all take into account the reality that the economic system of the West is the financial pyramid of MMM Mavrodi, those who jump into it are the last to remain without any pants, giving their money to those who are at the top, which is really visible, the Ukrainians do not need. Here is another example of how to educate your country for myths.
  4. Mountain shooter
    Mountain shooter 28 August 2014 07: 45
    This is the end for Julia as a political figure. Tough they are with her. True, all this camarilla will not live long. And I won’t give a year. So with her - without her, it doesn’t matter. Dill place in the soup!
  5. Akvadra
    Akvadra 28 August 2014 07: 48
    Bravo! Very accurate analysis!)))
  6. inkass_98
    inkass_98 28 August 2014 07: 48
    Zubchenko is a fine fellow, literally burns with napalm. I constantly read it on the Ruinsky People like it there too. Those. not all of them have moved out of the gut, there are sane and just normal, sane people.
    1. Owl27
      Owl27 28 August 2014 09: 21
      Thanks to the author !!! If we still laugh, then we are alive !!!!
  7. A1L9E4K9S
    A1L9E4K9S 28 August 2014 07: 50
    Gentlemen are not noble towards a woman with a scythe, she found you in the garbage dump, warmed you up, cleaned you from parasites (which were really horrible) and brought you to people, to throw Yulka at the most difficult moment, what a black ingratitude. her tears after Maidan number 3.
  8. special
    special 28 August 2014 07: 50
    Nice article ... cheered up ... laughing
  9. Revolver
    Revolver 28 August 2014 07: 58
    Ukraine is a country of the future, which, as you know, never comes.
  10. yulka2980
    yulka2980 28 August 2014 08: 33
    I laughed heartily! Bravo to the author! Write more often!
  11. MilesAth
    MilesAth 28 August 2014 08: 34
    The author's style is just a class! And the analysis is very sensible.
    He laughed heartily. Thank!

    Julia (she’s a woman with a scythe) will still show herself. You will see, it still pops up. After (politically) bury all the heroes of today. In fact, in the events that take place - it has nothing to do with it. Poroshenko is responsible for everything, Yatsenyuk for the collapse of the economy, Geletey for the so-called ATO, Turchinov ... this one is responsible for a lot. And, notice, only one Julia against their background looks like a kind of white and fluffy angel who did not touch the flies (everyone has already forgotten about the 8 million Russians who need to be shot). It is likely that she will reappear when the ruling sweeps the new Maidan. It will appear in the role of a sort of Ukrainian patriot - the only hope for the salvation of the country. Wait and see.
    1. Andrey Yuryevich
      Andrey Yuryevich 28 August 2014 08: 39
      Quote: MilesAth
      You will see, it still pops up.

      I'm sorry ... but not it а it ! Of course it will pop up, it does not sink !!!
  12. VICTOR-61
    VICTOR-61 28 August 2014 08: 34
    She Julia will still take revenge on them at all. There’s no mess without laughter. Politicians don’t think about the economy, but where to pinch Russia
  13. Neo1982
    Neo1982 28 August 2014 09: 52
    Does anyone know what else is “volatility”? anyone in the subject?
    SVAROGE 28 August 2014 10: 46
    ... "Everyone is happy, admiringly watching the change of numbers at gas stations and congratulating each other on the approach to European standards" ...

    Oh, little thing, how good it is! )))
  15. melnik
    melnik 28 August 2014 11: 11
    And it seems to me that Julia has a very real chance of becoming president, what they will have left there.
    R.S. Cool picture
  16. Vend
    Vend 28 August 2014 11: 33
    Tymoshenko, that she, in their opinion, does not satisfy their submission about racial harmony. Honestly, I am outraged by this anti-gender approach. She found them, in the garbage dump, picked them up, warmed them up, brought them to people. And now these people are “figwamy” to her. Moreover, Arsen Avakov called Yulia Vladimirovna “a former partner” and hinted that one should remain “friends”. It seems to me that such an attitude towards a woman is not acceptable.

    We need this to ... regret it? Well uh horns. Did she not call to enclose the southeast with barbed wire? It was they who organized the Maidan. to get out of jail. But she is still able to bite.
  17. Balbes_I
    Balbes_I 28 August 2014 12: 13
    Do not look for truth where it does not exist, just stock up on popcorn ...
  18. not a sailor
    not a sailor 28 August 2014 13: 08
    More precisely, volatility is a statistical financial indicator characterizing price volatility. It is the most important financial indicator and concept in financial risk management, where it is a measure of the risk of using a financial instrument for a given period of time. To calculate volatility, a statistical indicator of sample standard deviation is used, which allows investors to determine the risk of acquiring a financial instrument.