I am writing this post, having left Ukraine. I was going to write something like that in Kiev, but then my position had not yet crystallized, and my fears were for my future, for my financial situation and even for my life. I have an old blog in LiveJournal, and I am a fairly well-known person not only in Kiev, but in all of Ukraine.
So: I am not writing under my own name from outside of my native and beloved Ukraine. And I am writing this post in Russian, so that they also read and see that there are people in Ukraine who are trying to think objectively, and there are still people who are tired of listening to someone else’s interpretations, and finally want to hear the voice of reason. Yes, and I communicate in Russian as something more comfortable.
When I left Ukraine, I emerged from the water. Could not breathe life, a free life without politicians, political News and hatred, widespread hatred. But I was on Independence Square. Almost from the very beginning, in the very first days I began to go there. The first time the whole family came, and then one, and with friends - when how. And he brought money, and transferred .., and things, and SMS ... And he participated. In general, I accepted the revolution, and it has my contribution. But then I began to think. Sorry, but this is characteristic of creative people: to think, to be critical of reality, to be critical of yourself.
I became keenly interested - what do we want? What does our small, but freedom-loving people want? Not what we say from the stands, or from the TV screen, and not what our press writes and publishes the Internet, not what our politicians say, but what moves us? What makes us act, speak, write, argue, demand - to die and kill others? What makes us what we are?
The first glimpses of understanding came to me on the day when I got into the crowd of football fans. Most of them were teenagers and guys no older than 20-22. They broke into the subway, screaming, swearing, bullying. And then I ended up in the same carriage with them. No, I perceived them as my own, without feeling aggression towards myself from their side. And then they started a famous event - you know which one. And then for the first time I felt a violence against myself. I had to jump with them at least a couple of times to show which side of the barricades I was on. But I already made my choice before. But the crowd is not interested in the voluntary choice of one of its particles: the crowd forces, the crowd forces them to make this choice again and present it in a barbaric, savage form. My voluntariness does not count her ... In general, I do not like these dances. Why should I, a serious adult man, stoop to this? To me not considered Moskal? Rave!
Later there was something else, but the tragedy in Odessa was a turning point for my understanding. I realized that a witch hunt was on, and the witches had already begun to burn. They can be burned. If I had previously imagined “moskalyaku” (who was a gilyak) as a drunken, unshaven, dirty and evil peasant, then now I saw that among the Muscovites are also 50-year-old teacher Maria Ivanovna, and the young father leading her son to kindergarten, and the girl , going on its first date - they are all cattle, quilted jackets, Muscovites, and with them you can do anything we want.
I remembered how in one of the tents on Independence Square, during the height of the events, there was a map on which our activists marked loyal cities. On this map, a part of Ukraine was separated by a dash and indicated - “titushki”. And in conversations, we always did not take East into account, as an active element. We wanted to establish power in Kiev, and then we had to start cleaning the east of all titus. We felt that we were the masters of destinies, demiurgists - and Kharkov, Donetsk, etc., were considered the field of our activity. And so, I went to the main ...
We do not admit the thought that Muscovites, Katsaps, aunts ... no, let's call it right - Russians, they are equal to us. For us, they are cattle. Stupid cattle, slaves, quilted jackets, hordes, animals, insects. We cannot allow the thought that they can have their own opinion, they can decide something. We are the people, we can have an opinion, plans, sympathies, but they are not capable of that. They can only execute the orders of their Fuhrer, Putin. Therefore, for us the point of view is completely unacceptable that in Donetsk or in Lugansk the population can, on its own initiative, resist the power that we have seized for them. Suppose such a seditious thought, and we have to accept as a fact that the Russians are also able to resist in an organized way, to fight to the death of their own accord. Able to fight for their freedom, for their rights, for their future. Agree - we can not allow such a thought. Therefore, we will persistently always prove to ourselves that it is Putin or Yanyk who is sending his titushki, slaves, and quilted jackets; Putin is sending Chechens to us who are terrorizing the population’s east. But we forget that more recently, in Kharkov and Donetsk there were no armed people, and thousands of crowds seized the administration, following the example of our Maidan.
No, we never considered Muscovites people. We always wanted to overwhelm Putin and reassign the slaves to another master. This is our national fun: register under “Vanka” and write something like that. Like, Putin brought the country to the edge, there is no longer any life, poverty and hopelessness. After all, we cannot pass by without groaning something that can be useful or pleasant to the Russians. To humiliate them, to put in the black light - this is our main task on the Internet. Half of the “Russian opposition” network is us, the citizens of Ukraine.
In general, it seems to me that everything stems from our chauvinism, from frenzied nationalism. We consider ourselves free people, and Russian slaves and even insects. After all, they could have reached agreement with the East, but brought it up to what. We hate Putin, hate Russians, and don’t want them to influence us in any way, but now Germans, British, Czechs, Poles are sitting in our ministries and are watching us like kindergartens. No shit myself - freedom! We eat American buns from the hands of an American diplomat, and we consider Donetsk to be slaves. We want Ukraine to be united, and the Americans, with their secret pieces, thermal imagers and other crap, find goals for our lads, among our fellow citizens. We allow them to work out their technologies in Donetsk and Lugansk. What is it, huh?
And see how Parashenka passed by the falling soldier. After all, he fell when our prezik had not yet passed him. Only stooped for fear and added a step. Did not stop, did not help. Passed by and that's it! Of course, he went to power! What kind of soldier is he, a simple man? Thank you for not wiping your feet on the lad. How many times did he do this, rising to the top of power? How many times does he step over us?
So, the whole trouble in our arrogance. We deny some of our fellow citizens their right to be equal to us. We deny them the right to be human. We are ready to kill them, but not to negotiate with them, so that they do not think about themselves to be divine. Of course, because they are cattle, insects. We understand perfectly well that Russia will not accept the coal east. Because it does not need coal, and we can refuse it. And the miners will go knocking helmets to Moscow, and not to Kiev. We could agree, but we cannot afford it. We want to destroy cattle, imagines himself to be people. Our leaders want to completely destroy the separatist leaders in order to increase their flock. And Parashenka takes advantage of this, gaining authority on the blood. Including, and on blood of participants of the Maidan. We hate oriental cattle, titushek and go to great lengths to grind them into powder, but we will not take them as a level.
I do not know how I now live in Ukraine. I would not want to leave, but probably have to. But I hope that the understanding will come to other people from among the intelligentsia. After all, it was not we who made the revolution. It was made by specially trained people trained in the camps of Lithuania and Poland - people with hatred in their hearts. It was financially supported by people from America and Europe - people with their own interests. And we just legitimized it for the world community. Is this our choice? If ours, then why are the oligarchs in power again, and in the country of hatred? Maybe enough to rage and do everything in spite to someone, and do something for yourself? Maybe, to begin with, we will begin to respect others, and suppose the idea that they are not slaves and cattle - and people? People - with their own destiny, dreams, the right to freedom and happiness.