Military Review

Features of female anatomy, or Live and learn

A boy, Stas, served with me in the company. A typical child of the middle Ukrainian province. Being from somewhere in the village, he was not distinguished by an abundance of knowledge, but in his own way he was endowed with some of his worldly wisdom or cunning, intuition or sense, or something. This was especially true of the "flights" - he managed to barely hit them. Fed with fresh milk and natural products, Stas had remarkable strength and was tall. In view of the latter qualities, it was determined by the PKM machine gunner (and even on an urgent basis). He easily pulled a 9-kilogram colossus, ran marches with it across the intersection, not straining too much, dragging almost the entire BC with him. He fired from the PC masterfully. In general, a kind of rural cotton that speaks "like a nightmare with a Ukrainian voice." He was 21 years old and spent the last 3 years in the army.


Night. Dark. Being in a night patrol we stand near some administrative building, a hospital or something. BTR stands in the shadows in total darkness, so it was not visible. The guys came to patrol and, having thrown off the armor, fell asleep in the Beteer. The platoon Oleg also climbed onto the reclining commander's seat. Soon from the covered hatches, the snoring of six fighters was heard. Only Stas and I didn’t sleep - we remained to protect the guys' sleep. After walking around the car and checking everything around again, we climbed onto the armor and lay down on the sloping part of the tower with our back to each other. In such a position to sit comfortably for a long time. The silhouette on the background of the battery is not visible and you do not have an armor on your shoulders. The only drawback - I want to sleep. But we have long understood how to deal with it - to talk to each other little by little. And time passes quickly, and you will know the people.

What are the only topics not raised long nights. What only disputes did not arise. It came to fights - after all, the male team. But most often it all came down to the women. It is understandable - the year they have not seen. But for the locals everything is wrapped in a black veil, and one cannot stare at them. In general, word for word went memories and sharing experiences. It soon became clear that Stasik had nothing to remember and share. He had a "dvchchina" (at least, he thought so) with whom he met. And, as I understood, she gave him a couple of times, but it was before the army. In the army, he did not muddle anything with anyone. Therefore, Stas listened carefully stories "experienced" walker. While telling my next student love affair, I mentioned the word "clitoris". Stas perked up with this word:

- Chuesh, Sashko, and scho vono take - clitor?

- And why don't you know? Well you said that girlfriend pisyunil. What, did not consider and did not feel?

- Ta ni bachich, zvichachno. And what not? I chuv, yakscho clitor ...

CLICK. The soft cotton in the night silence from the side of the nearest building caught our attention. Almost immediately to the ground in 40-50 meters from us something fell. We, without saying a word, have slipped for armor. A grenade explosion (3,2-4,2 sec) caught us in a fall to the ground. They started shooting from a machine gun from somewhere in the building. Judging by the sound - two. Bullets chirkali armor on top and went up. Stas put the PC on the nose of the armored personnel carrier and already shot into the darkness. I crawled away from the car and leaned out of the ditch to see where they were felled from. From the baiter the boys already jumped out and, hiding behind their armor, began to shoot. Someone fired from the loopholes. I spotted two lights from above:


But the guys have already shot there. Suddenly a bright pillar of light tore up the darkness - the tower shooter turned on the spotlight on the CPVT. It became clear one of the shooters. Flames blazed out of the two battered trunks of the tower. Glass and bricks shattered on top. The searchlight fumbled on the edge of the roof and on the building. Oleg has already commanded:

- See that the RPG is not banged on the armored personnel carrier. Look in the nightlights, what's behind in the field? Everything is clear?

I looked in the field. Like anybody. The guys took turns tapping the forgotten ones in the heat of the armor jacket and hard hat without taking their eyes off the hospital building. I got up and approached them, Oleg was surprised to see me:

- What are you doing there? Have you slept Have you fired at least once?

- So you have time to dick!

In short, we cordoned off and searched the building. Found in the basement only frightened shooting guard with a gun. No one else. Night arrows quickly climbed down the fire escape from the other side of the building, crossed the aryk and drove off in a car with the headlights turned off. They left a handful of sleeves on the roof, wet marks and tire prints on the other side of the ditch. Everything that happened took half an hour from strength, but nobody slept until morning.


Our platoon guarded American engineers who were restoring a strategic bridge. We strengthened the detachment of the Pindos infantry (on one "Hammer" consisting of 5 people). The bandies have already blown up the bandyuks a couple of times and we checked all the cars passing over it during the day for explosives. Amer-infantrymen on one side of the bridge, we - on the other. At night, the curfew - we were moving in and going to bed exposing only the guard of the bridge and the American construction battalion on it. Two sentries on each side of the bridge, periodically inspected and under the bridge. I had to stand with an American soldier. spoke English well. But Stasik asked to stand with me. I did not care, and I agreed. I have already forgotten about the unfinished conversation with Stas. When he started talking on this topic, as soon as we sat down with our backs to each other on the road by the builders' truck:

- Oh, I want to sleep. Do you think about klіtor?

- About what? What is the clitoris? - I tried to remember when I talked to him about the clitoris.

- Pig! Yakiy, yakiy. Zh_nochy, zvychayno, yaky. Guess. If we were beaten by likarns, you smacked?

I began to recall the circumstances of that conversation and smiled. Wow, how much time has passed. Month, two. And that clitoris does not give him peace. Probably because of this I went to the guard. Hiding a smile, I put a nightlight to my eyes and looked around: the bridge was on the track, in the field, and there were no settlements nearby. A couple of groves near the bridge, 400 and 800 meters before them. In the afternoon we checked them - nobody is there. In the near natykat signaling. Only on the horizon, in the green light of a night lamp, were the scanty lights of a nameless town or aul.

- So the axis, scho i want to drink in you. They seemed to be a clitoris, tokobi sob, folds shkіri. And de wonna fold, above, above? Chee vseredin? Yak to get to get? Chi spravdі, scho yakscho tsei clitor pestiti fingers, devchіі fit?

Well, I thought about it all the time! I even thought about what to ask. I smiled even more. I turned away from him, so as not to neigh. Looking into the nightlight at a distant grove, I saw flashes.

- LIE!

Simultaneously with a scream over his head whistled bullets. When we fell and crawled to the high bump stop of the bridge, the sounds of automatic shots came from the grove. Stas lay down under the bump stop, stuck his trunk into the railing of the bridge and gave a long one. On the other side of the bridge, they haven’t sweetened yet, whence the fire remained silent. I looked at the area around the night light: they seemed to be shooting only from a grove. The radayka on the shoulder came to life.

- Chevo there? Where are they beating? - asked HF.

- From a far grove. - I crawled over to Stas - Stasik, is there a tracer? Give me a label where to beat.

But on the other hand, we already decided on the goal and opened fire themselves. Zababahal KPVT. I spotted firing points on the nightlight: 1,2,3,4,5,6 ... 9. Somewhere like that. Not equipped with a night sight, the KPVT hit lower and to the left of the targets. I gave TsU automatic. Each 3 cartridge is a tracer. Large caliber BTR went where necessary. Corrected, thank God. I looked around again. Connected to the shooting and stroybat. The sky is even more illuminated by tracer. Stasik changed the box. BACH. An RPG rocket flew into the sky in our direction. She flew more than halfway and plopped 150-200 meters from us. In morons, even used a grenade thrown. There are meters of 800 to us, dick flies RPG, except that hinges. On the other side of the bridge, AGS of the Amer. Glory to you, woke up. The breaks went to bed at first close, but then they began to explode in the grove. Well done foot soldiers. Shooting slowly faded away. The voice of the platoon commander spoke up:

- Look around carefully. Check under the bridge.

Stas remained on the cover. I went to the builders:

- Hey, gays. Come with me. Check under bridge.

One soldier volunteered, and we looked under the bridge. On the other side of the river under the bridge, someone, too, fumbled from ours. Reported that everything was OK, Stas and I sat down to watch further into the night light. Judging by the fact that no one went anywhere, the platoon leader was not going to chase after the attackers. When we were changed, and we came to the batteer, we heard Eugene's abuse. He tried to prove something to the American infantryman. Only “Fuck” was heard. Pindos sat on the ground, head down, and was offended silent. I asked:

- What are you doing to him?

- What? - Zhenya turned to me - And I'll tell you what. Here they are beating at us, but these fools with AGS on the “Hummer” are silent. I come to them, and they are bronics, you see, they dress and fasten a helmet. They slept without them. Fak their mother !!!

“Well, you managed to cover them normally,” I tried to justify the allies.

- Yeah, right now !!!

Jeka spat, asked for a cigarette and lit it on the side. Later it turned out that while the amers were dressing, it was Zheka who was shooting in the form of a naked torso and without a brontik, firing from Mark-19. Mark-19 in principle as our AGS-17. We used to be allowed to shoot with it, and we had the skill. Just to a US soldier, insurance for injury is laid only if he is fully equipped, with weapons and with a cartridge in the chamber. These are the rules.

In the morning, we carefully inspected the brilliant green; the tracks of two cars left it in the sands. In the grove, we found one machine gun and traces of blood, apparently hit someone. We are back to guard the ill-fated bridge.


Somewhere in a week I was sitting in a smoking room and smoking a hookah with a couple of boys. It was around 11 in the evening, and almost everyone was asleep. Stas appeared on the threshold of the smoking room. As a non-smoker, he trampled on the spot, went for coke from the refrigerator and sat down with us. We lazily pulled the hookah and talked about something. When everyone began to disperse, Stasik called me aside and asked quietly:

- About the price, I want, Sashko, all the same, get to be for the klіtor. De vіn є?

I could not stand it and laughed.

- And he does not give you peace, right? Do not sleep at night? You throw it. As soon as you ask for it, so some shit happens. Maybe this is a sign of fate? Maybe you don't need to know it?

Stas was embarrassed:

- That pishov ti ...

I began to calm down on the sly:

- Yes, okay, Stasik. Now I will tell all that I know.

And within five minutes I told him the secret of the clitoris. All he knew about this part of the female body.

PS Morality. The irony of fate - we were taught to fight, and we could die without having tasted many of the pleasures of life. War and sick children are the most unjust things on earth. And despite this, at that moment I was ready to die. Believe me, the willingness to die is a very powerful weapon. Now I do not have this weapon. Fortunately or not, I do not know.

PPS I sincerely hope that my friend Stas used the data obtained from me about the features of the female body structure. And I also believe that soon the school textbooks of anatomy will correct and remove the item "paragraph 40, 41 (" Male and female genitals ") to study independently."
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  1. bomg.77
    bomg.77 25 November 2013 08: 02 New
    Laughed thanks!
    You as soon as you ask for him, so some shit happens.
    All right, all the troubles from women laughing laughing
    1. experienced
      experienced 25 November 2013 10: 48 New
      It is better to drink a liter of vodka than to suck a salty clitoris ... The wisdom of the people wassat
  2. makarov
    makarov 25 November 2013 09: 24 New
    "As soon as you ask for him, some shit happens."

    One step from him to shit.
  3. faraon
    faraon 25 November 2013 10: 39 New
    A good soldier’s bike, we had two of these guys in the ward from the deaf KARELIAN TREE AND FIGHT from Siberia. But I still hope that with the help of our cultural enlightenment after the demobilization they did not hit the face with dirt.
  4. Day 11
    Day 11 25 November 2013 12: 55 New
    Something recalled this moment
    1. Day 11
      Day 11 25 November 2013 22: 33 New
      "You need to tear them to defeat, until they turn blue, tilt and tear ..." Well said ...! S..ka, young people, listen to sound thoughts --- believe me, when I studied at a military school, I tore them. This is not Pont, you yourself will understand in time
      1. Military79
        26 November 2013 00: 12 New
        You didn’t come across such a commander in a military school?
        1. Day 11
          Day 11 26 November 2013 00: 27 New
          And, s-ka, this is a plus! This is b-d Major Ryabykh (in the sense of our analogue) !!! I, b .. I am falling! Our parade ground (practically). Thank you, my friend !!!!!!! ,
          remembered! Thanks again!
          1. Day 11
            Day 11 26 November 2013 01: 07 New
            It’s kind of like training conscripts, but still, like us, cadets. The Army will not let you lie
  5. vissokii
    vissokii 25 November 2013 23: 44 New
    1. Day 11
      Day 11 25 November 2013 23: 48 New
      I don’t understand, what does Yugoslavia have to do with it? Look FULLY laid out
      1. Starik63
        Starik63 26 November 2013 21: 18 New
        Murmansk Obd. Monchegorsk village 25 km air defense. That's for sure, I know.
  6. vissokii
    vissokii 26 November 2013 10: 48 New
    Then I realized. The Ukrainian army in Iraq
  7. alligator-2017
    alligator-2017 27 November 2013 21: 14 New
    Interesting bike.
  8. Kunar
    Kunar 30 December 2013 17: 47 New
    It is better to drink a liter of vodka .... And so learn the duties of the sentry)) laughing
  9. Cpa
    Cpa 1 July 2014 01: 56 New
    Hey, gays. Come with me. Check under bridge.

    The author casually called amers gay laughing