Results of the week. “No ... This is not Rio de Janeiro. This is much worse. ”
Part I. "Another small, but rather big question"
Promotion of deserters in Lithuania
Escaped from the army - got cash
Valiant Lithuanian military personnel who fled from the Soviet Army in March 1990, and then were caught and sentenced to various terms for desertion, will now be rewarded by the Lithuanian authorities. Perhaps, deserters are going to award with high military awards "The sparkling heels of Lithuania" or "Escape in exchange for independence"? .. No. The government of the state that is part of the European Union decided to distribute all sisters of 4000 LTL worth of earrings to the “fighter”. If we take into account that the “fighters” were already encouraged by the Lithuanian leadership in the middle of 90, and then compensation amounted to 3 thousands of litas per one “litas”, then from January 2013's “shortage” of one thousand litas (about 300 euros) will be paid in addition to full compliance with the Lithuanian free legal law.
Well, the support of warriors for independent Lithuania is important at all times. Only because the current fighters of the Lithuanian military units, inspired by the precedent of their "ancestors", can go the same way. And what they say, why are we worse than Algirdas or Vytautas, who waved through the fences of the Soviet military units in 1990? And let's say, and we will wave from the NATO formations! You look, in years through 10-15, they will also give compensation, because Lithuania, like a couple of its Baltic neighbors, is an extremely flexible state: just a little mess, so quickly, to the side of the former opponent ...
Enjoy Your Bath, Latvia!
How Eldar Ryazanov prevented Latvians from becoming Europeans
Europeanization has gone to the fore in the Baltic countries. While the authorities in Lithuania financially encourage deserters, individual politicians in Latvia consider it their duty to protect the Latvian people from (you will be surprised) Soviet propaganda! Yes Yes! Neither more nor less ... The reader will ask: but, excuse me, where did the Soviet propaganda in Latvia of the new time come from? You do not know yet? Then go and ask the ex-diplomat Normunds Vasarins. Mr Vasarins about Soviet propaganda knows everything!
He declares that the Latvian people would long ago have become truly European if they had stopped watching the film “Irony of Fate, or Enjoy Your Bath!” According to Vasarins, this film litters the mindset and clearly prevents the Latvians from breaking their past. The question of whether the Latvians themselves want to break up with this past, Vasarins, is obviously not given.
Let's try to figure out what in the film of the inimitable Eldar Ryazanov prevents Latvians from becoming Europeans. So, in the storyline, Zhenya Lukashin throws his bride Galya. Well, can this confuse the right Latvian? Of course not, because in 1990 Riga nothing prevented finding “Nadia” on the western side, breaking into independence in a foreign European apartment ...
Perhaps, Vasarinshu and his like-minded people does not allow an episode to turn into a bath in Europeans? After all, real Europeans have long ceased to hide their causal places with bath towels before the camera ...
Or maybe Vasarins doesn’t give rest to Hippolyt’s speech about how disgusting your fish is? Apparently, the former employee of the Latvian Foreign Ministry found in the words of the hero of the actor Yury Yakovlev a transparent hint at Latvian sprats ...
In general, after the words of Vasarins, Eldar Ryazanov can sit down at a book entitled: “How I prevented the right Latvians from becoming Europeans.” Eldar Alexandrovich, it will be a bestseller!
Ex-minister at the crossroads
Or maybe to Latvia ...
Apparently, in order not to let the Latvians finally break with Russia, in the press this week there was an entertaining information that former Defense Minister Anatoly Serdyukov asked for a residence permit in this Baltic republic. So far, information about the request of Serdyukov in the Latvian Foreign Ministry has not been confirmed, but some media say that Anatoly Eduardovich has already managed to visit the Baltic shores. Some publications attribute his visit to Latvia to the fact that it is here that the company of his lawyer, Heinrich Padva, “Padva un partneri Baltija” is located. This firm is engaged in rendering services in relation to foreign citizens in terms of obtaining for them a residence permit in Latvia.
While this information is not confirmed and not disproved, it is worth pondering why it is Latvia that Anatoly Eduardovich can choose as his haven. Usually, after all, our compatriots, who are forced to leave high posts against their will, decrease no closer than the British capital.
Perhaps the ex-minister has an irresistible craving for Baltic amber, and, you understand, not to move to the Kaliningrad region. Or maybe the fact is that Anatoly Eduardovich was also tired of seeing the New Year coming under the film “The Irony of Fate”, and he decided to take refuge in a quiet Riga, away from the Russian “bath” in which he and his women's battalion could have something to soap ... Soap with brooms is there, the main thing is that bath attendants should be found ...
And let the pension wait
President extended service life for government officials to 70 years
Russian President Vladimir Putin has decided to start 2013 a year with a gift to all Russian officials who were turned into the word “pension” by the unfriendly. The president decided to put aside all attempts of detractors with one stroke of the pen, signing a bill that from now on any state official can remain in the public service until 70 years (before the 2013 began, the official could remain at his post if the desire arose until 65 years). There is, however, one limitation: the president will take the decision “to leave — not to leave” the official in his post personally. So let the officials try in one format or another not to support the president after such a gift ...
Proceeding from the new law, mathematicians have deduced the following pattern: the closer the age of a state official will be closer to 65 years, the less disagreements this official will have with the general line of the head of state. Well, judge for yourself who is hunting in the prime of bureaucratic forces when families have already managed to make friends with prosecutors, judges, heads of regional departments of the traffic police, heads of real estate control departments, federal inspectors and other "colleagues" to go for a well-deserved rest? That's right: no one! Yes, and to send an official in 65 for years to retire is somehow not human. And where is the honor in respect of highly experienced managers? .. Where is the support of a comfortable old age? ..
In general, thousands of Russian assistants, ministers, deputies, advisers, state secretaries, inspectors and others breathed a sigh of relief. Five years from now it will be possible to serve Mother Russia with faith and righteousness, another five years it will be possible to take care of each individual Russian citizen, from Chukotka to the Baltic shores.
And we, ordinary citizens, fell a stone from the heart. And then, in fact, some kind of anxiety took over the heart. How are they, the poor, in 65 something of their young years will be alone with the pension? But - carried by! Mean tears of joy flow down my cheeks ...
Language confusion in Ukraine
In the beginning was the word ...
At the end of last year and at the beginning of the new year, fraternal Ukraine began to worry about the linguistic features of the national language. As previously reported, one of the deputies of the fairly noisy Svoboda party, by the name of Miroshnichenko, recently used the word “zhidovka” in one of his Internet posts in relation to one of Hollywood actresses of Ukrainian origin. The statements of the nationalist caused a wide discussion in the society, and the Jewish center of Kiev even turned to the Ukrainian Ministry of Justice for clarification about the legality of the use of this term and other terms similar to it. At the end of 2012, the Ukrainian advocates of justice did not see anything reprehensible in the word “Zhidovka”, and a whole number of politicians bluntly stated that this is a quote, “a common word from the Ukrainian language that was used even a couple of centuries ago by classic writers”.
In general, Ukrainian freedom-loving nationalists celebrated a local victory and reaped the benefits of what a wonderful PR campaign for their party was conducted by both the Jewish center of Kiev and a number of media outlets along with the Ministry of Justice of Ukraine.
However, after a short time, the political force finally decided to step in, which seemed to have won the Ukrainian elections to the Verkhovna Rada. Representatives of this political force (the “Party of Regions”) called for a law banning the use of words that would even indirectly call for ethnic hatred and confrontation among the peoples inhabiting Ukraine.
This proposal was made by the representative of the “Party of Regions” MP Kolesnichenko. According to him, the statements that if the words "Jews", "Ukrainians" and others like them used classical literature, for example, in the XIX century, this does not mean that these words are suitable for modern speech. Kolesnichenko decided to hold his own example. He says that in the works of the famous American writer Mark Twain often the word "nigger", but for the use of the same word, obviously derogatory in its meaning and sound, today in the US, you can get a receipt with a written out imposing a fine. This does not mean that Mark Twain in the United States ceased to appreciate.
For the use of this and other similar words by the decision of specially convened commissions, athletes may be disqualified for a long time. Such episodes often occur in various leagues in Europe and the world, and FIFA severely punishes the “linguistically liberated” for a long language.
But then you say FIFA ... Miroshnichenko is not at FIFA ...
However, the incident, the author of which was a nationalist deputy, still did not go unheeded. The case is interested in the European Parliament. Many will say, and where is the separately taken situation in Ukraine and MEPs. But how! Official Kiev, after all, stated more than once that it has a propensity for European integration ... So, the deputies of the European Parliament called on the Verkhovna Rada factions to condemn the representatives of the Svoboda party and stop all political relations with these "party members" until they realize their mistake.
Further, according to the law of the genre, the “unfairly offended” “svobodovtsy” headed by the beacon of the incident, Ms. Fahrion, who had risen to defend her colleague Miroshnichenko, again entered the business. Irina Fahrion, whose national identity is ambiguous, to put it mildly, that same Irina Dmitrievna Fahrion, who at one time (according to her former classmates) was the only member of the CPSU at the faculty, decided to declare that the European Parliament spoke against the Freedom party with "Agent of Moscow". The agent of the Russian special services Fahrion called the European parliamentarians from Bulgaria Christian Vigenin, who made a call to boycott the very existence of the Freedom faction in the Verkhovna Rada.
In general: “and the battle continues again”, and more than one spear will be broken in passionate conversations about which words in the Ukrainian language are correct and which are not.
The language theme of Ukraine is picked up by another parliamentarian, Alexander Briginets from the Batkivshchyna faction. The same Briginets, who loves to walk in the national Ukrainian shirt, trying with all his might to emphasize what kind of blood flows in his opposition, like the strings of a strained vein.
So, the deputy left, as much as a corporate party of “Batkivshchyna” in protest against the fact that at the corporate party, in addition to the Ukrainian speech, there was also a Russian speech. The deputy was simply outraged! And I wouldn’t be indignant, because Alexander Mikhailovich threw himself at the corporate party not by any rotten Russian rubles out there, but by the very least freely convertible hryvnias honestly earned on the adoption of progressive laws for all Ukrainian people. He threw himself off, put on his shirt, the oseledez famously combed in, but then he remembered that he had not had time to grow his forelock in the right direction, and then - on you! Russian, corrupting the deputy, speech. But the deputy Briginets, apparently, loses his will at the sounds of the Russian language, and the spirit of nationalism in him is shattered ... So 50-year-old boy could not resist. He rushed at full speed to the exit to breathe in the free Kiev air, but on the capital’s Ukrainian streets no-no, but Russian words were heard, from which the deputy and prose writer threw an uncontrollable shiver. It would be better to visit Fahrion - for a cup of gorilka ...
GUAMYUK - it sounds good
Georgia wants to invite South Korea as a partner
For Georgia 2013, the year began with the fact that this country took over the chairmanship of such a union as GUAM (Georgia, Ukraine, Azerbaijan, Moldova) from the hands of Azerbaijan. And as soon as the reins of power turned to official Tbilisi, they immediately heard words about ambitious plans to expand the organization and transform it from a regional petty party, often deciding how to sting Moscow into a truly global institution. Initially, they wanted to give the world level at the expense of Nauru and Tuvalu, but then they remembered in time that these countries recognized the independence of Abkhazia and South Ossetia ... And since the stage was recognized, there should be no place for them in the democratic cohort ...
Then, apparently, they wanted to call for the unification of the United States, but in Washington, Mrs. Clinton searched for a very long time on the map a country called ... GUAM. As a result, I found the island of Guam, read that it was already part of the United States under limited conditions, and was surprised that what the “islanders” still want from the White House ...
In general, with Georgian integration and cartography, everything is not thankful to God: either confusion with the state of Georgia, or with American Guam.
And now decided to go the other way. Maya Panjikidze said that Tbilisi plans to attract South Korea to GUAM in the near future. Why South Korea, Ms. Panjikidze did not clarify, but if Seoul suddenly decides to join the friendly family of real Guamians, the organization will have to be renamed GUAMYUK.
Part II. “And I see in every person what he came out of. And the man came out of the monkey "
Putin is in the lead ... second
Ahead - "nobody"
The foreign policy magazine has pleased the world public with another rating of influence. It would seem that these ratings, lists and portraits on the covers were boring to the public: here and Forbes gave the politicalperson his list, and Time was the person of the year Obama called (having presented the black president with a black background). What did the editors of “Foreign Policy” have been able to distinguish themselves with?
If "Forbes" put Vladimir Putin in the list of the most influential people in the world in third place, then in the "Foreign Policy" they gave the leader of Russia the second place. By "influential", by the way, understood "The ability to make decisions that affect the lives and well-being of a large number of people." And if “Time” excluded from the candidates for the cover of the North Korean atomic comrade Kim Jong-un, although it was he who scored the overwhelming majority of the votes of the readers, then “Foreign Policy”, putting the Russian president in second place, gave first place ... to anyone.
“In the world without heroes, everyone is waiting for someone who can take on all the most difficult and dangerous tasks,” says an explanatory journal. “All other leaders on our list are too concerned with solving local and regional problems.”
Obviously, if Velimir Khlebnikov were alive, he would give him the palm in the “Foreign Policy”. After all, this poet called himself the chairman of the globe.
Rating continues: US Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke, a man who provides the whole world with petrodollars; German Chancellor Angela Merkel, Europe's gluer; US President Barack Obama and others.
The second, almost the first, V. Putin’s place in the magazine explained: “... although he is not as popular as he was used to, and his country does not have such influence as the USSR, no one on the planet concentrated more local and regional power than Putin. "
So that's it, gentlemen and comrades. If the great and mighty V.V.P. had recreated the USSR (say, under the name of the Eurasian Union) and would have become even more popular than it is now, the Foreign Policy magazine would have placed it in the first place.
The geopolitical clue is understood. Thank you, compilers compilers!
Rich French will leave France
And poor Russians will become even poorer
The outflow of rich people from France reached unprecedented proportions. Despite the fact that a week ago the French Constitutional Council объявилthat the 75 percent “tax on the rich”, the profits from which the government hurried to include in the budget law for the 2013 year, “does not respect the equality of (citizens) before state fees” (the reason: the tax is calculated based on the income of one person, and meanwhile he must take into account the earnings of the whole family; moreover, the extremely high tax rate “violates equality in tax legislation”) and therefore will be slowed down, wealthy people continue to move away from France.
While the French government is writing a new edition of the “tax on the rich”, Comrade Depardieu has already received Russian citizenship - personally from President Putin. Film actor сказалthat is not going to change his decision and leave his homeland: “Let them (politicians) say. I do not care. This does not change anything".
Comrade Depardieu, who decided to refuse a French passport, had previously been greatly offended by Prime Minister Jean-Marc Eyro, who call the planned departure of the actor "unworthy."
Then it became known that Depardieu could settle in Belgium, where he bought real estate, in Montenegro or even Russia. Back in mid-December, he сказал: “Putin has already sent me a passport!” It was no joke.
Russian President Vladimir Putin is really сказалthat he is ready to assist the actor in obtaining Russian citizenship: “I understand the feelings of Gerard Depardieu, but I know for sure that we have friendly relations, that he considers himself a Frenchman, he lives it. If Gerard really wants a Russian passport, then we will assume that this issue has already been resolved positively. "
Kirov Governor Nikita Belykh proposed: “We must now register Depardieu in the Sanchur district of the Kirov region”.
Not stayed away from the alleged migration of Depardieu and Ramzan Kadyrov. He said that Grozny was ready to receive an actor.
However, Depardieu prefers simple birch trees to mountain landscapes.
On January 3, comrade Putin signed a decree granting Depardieu Russian citizenship, and in response, the famous actor confessed his love for Russia and the Russian people. In the message of a movie star received on Channel One, says: “I adore your country, Russia, your people, your historyyour writers. I like to make films here, in which I work together with such actors as Vladimir Mashkov. I adore your culture, your way of thinking. My father once was a communist and listened to the radio of Moscow! This is also a part of my culture ... I love your President Vladimir Putin very much, and this is mutual ... Russia is a country of great democracy, this is not a country where a prime minister could call a citizen of his country a miserable person. ” At the same time, Depardieu told me that megacities were alien to him, and he would not live in Moscow. He prefers the Russian village, and he “knows wonderful places”: “For example, there is one place that I love very much. Where the Gosfilmofond is located, under the management of my friend Nikolai Borodachev. There, near the birch forest, I feel great. " The actor added: “Only in such a big country we are never alone, because every tree, every landscape brings us hope. In Russia there is no pettiness, it is full of great feelings. And behind these feelings is hidden great chastity. In your greatness, I never feel lonely. " And he exclaimed: “Slava Rossii !! Spasibo! ”
Another French rich man, pop composer, performer and businessman Jean-Michel Jarre, also decided to leave his homeland. Megalopolises do not frighten off this person. He also seems to like the English fogs: he is going to settle in London.
3 on January стало известноthat the musician is negotiating with the British government. His company, Jarre Technologies, is likely to register now in Tech City, London. This place was created just for businessmen: the residents of Tech City enjoy substantial tax breaks.
Earlier, in September 2012, the billionaire and head of LVMH, Bernard Arno сообщилthat is moving to Belgium.
Infringement of the rich in order to fill the budget and in order to prevent "fiscal cliff" decided to produce in the United States. Here is the January 1 House of Representatives voted for an agreement that increases the tax rate for wealthy Americans.
The agreement finally reached by the Democrats and the Republicans provides for a tax increase for households with income from 450 thousand dollars per year, from 15 to 20%. Individuals who earn more than 400 a thousand dollars a year will also contribute more to the budget. Real estate tax with a value of $ 5 million will increase from 35% to 40%. The payroll tax will increase from 4,2% to 6,4%.
We began to pinch taxpayers in Russia, too, in the very place where citizen Depardieu is trying to enter. True, here, according to a long-standing capitalist tradition (we recall, the French president is a socialist), they once again attacked the poor, so Depardieu may not be afraid of losses.
As is known, at the end of November 2012, Vladimir Putin spoke in favor of canceling the transport tax and replacing this collection with a higher fuel excise. What could this mean in practice? That's right: the tax was not only saved, but also raised in Moscow. Moreover, the increase has affected the owners of low-cost mass machines; Rates for the rich owners of powerful cars remained the same.
The tax increase will be felt primarily by the owners of low-end brands with engines of less than 100 l. p .: almost all models of “Lada”, as well as “Chevrolet Lacetti”, “Renault Logan”, “Daewoo Nexia” and some others. The tax for them will grow from 7 rubles to 12. The rates for the expensive “horses” will remain: owners of cars with a capacity from 200 to 250 l. with. will still pay from 75 to 100 rubles for one unit of power.
However, Putin threatens to impose and rich. President of Russia instructed government to prepare a bill involving a tax increase for the owners of expensive cars. Turning December 12 to the Federal Assembly, V. Putin indicated that the idea of a luxury tax (not only on cars, but also on real estate) should be implemented in the first half of 2013.
Say what you like, but Depardieu will have to continue to ride a scooter in Russia. Sit on Lada - the tax authority will fill up his bills. Sit on the Bentley - and then there is a fault: it’s a luxury, not a means of transportation. It is not surprising that he prefers, firstly, a motor scooter, and secondly, a village and a birch rather than smoked Moscow, where Sobyanin has to pay for the pleasure of standing in traffic jams.
"Awkward Mammals"
They have a cold
According to a long-standing and ineradicable foreign opinion, there is always snow in Russia, and all residents are unhappy. Also, many believe that communism is still being built in Russia. Others object to the latter, at the same time convincing their opponents that the Russians have summer, sometimes it even looks in Siberia. However, this question causes misunderstanding to other foreigners: in the West often confused Siberia with Serbia.
In addition, there is a perception that Russians are rude. Their rudeness is expressed in the inability to say "thank you" and "hello." Cashiers like to take the wallet from the buyer and rummage there.
Hospitality in Russia is also special.
The Spaniards believe that at minus 25 degrees, Russians warm their hands in refrigerators. Tourists are amazed how in cold girls go in mini-skirts, and the guys walk without gloves and drink beer from cans. One Spaniard argues: what gloves to choose, thin or thick? It would be better to be fat, because he is in Russia, but in them a person becomes “the most awkward mammal.” For example, to write an SMS, gloves must be removed. “More than five phrases in SMS are proof of love” ...
The British believe that escape from the cold should be appropriate nutrition: eat large quantities of lard, potatoes and garlic. Then minus forty is not scary. In the Times you can read that the command of the North fleet Russia ordered additional batches of garlic, onions, lard and brown bread: this will improve the immunity of sailors in the Arctic cold. “I would not want to be on the leeward side,” the journalist notes. And then it reminds that the Russian soldiers won in the snows of Napoleon and Hitler.
Borderless Bulgaria
She is now in Colorado
Before the New Year, Bulgarian President Rosen Plevneliev spoke with congratulations on the background of natural beauty.
As long as he wished the Bulgarians everything very, very much in the coming year and said how beautiful Bulgaria was, the viewers could enjoy the panorama ... The Rocky Mountains in the American state of Colorado. To the credit of the Bulgarians, not all of them took them for the Rhodope mountains.
It revealedthat the clip was assembled by employees of the Bulgarian National Television in dubious co-authorship with the presidential administration. Co-authorship was as follows: BNT journalists offered illustrations, and then the administration approved them. The third co-author, by chance, was the Balkantourist travel site. It was from there that a picture of the mountains was borrowed by journalists. Losers from a travel company probably believed that the photographer captured the ski resort of Pamporovo, located in the Rhodope Mountains.
Perhaps, that glorious leisurely time was irretrievably passed away when reporters, cameramen, photographers rode or flew somewhere, filmed, fiddled with personnel and editing, invented signatures. In the too fast XXI century, there is the Internet, where someone has already photographed something and signed it somehow. And if last year, the American admiral John Natman, retired, pushed the speech to the glory of his native fleet, and the Black Sea ships sailed on the slides behind his back, now the Bulgarian president spoke out for the glory of the American mountains.
Enclosures of the 21st century
Iron Curtain Fashion
Did not have time in mid-December, Greece complete construction the protective wall on the border with Turkey, built to curb illegal immigration, as received the following information: On January 2, a solemn opening ceremony of the security fence on the Israeli-Egyptian border took place. The Jews had to work hard: if the Greek fence stretches for only 11 kilometers, then the Israelis installed an 227 kilometers protection barrier, spending 1,6 billion shekels (about 430 million dollars) on it.
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu сообщил: “We managed to completely stop the flow of foreign citizens illegally crossing the border; we will certainly succeed in our next mission, which is to return tens of thousands of people to the countries of origin.” Last January, an illegal immigrant entered 2153 in Israel, and in December, only 36 people were arrested.
But what has been achieved in Israel will not stop. The next stage of the project will be the construction of several kilometers of barrier structures in the Eilat region.
The Israelis and the Greeks are building walls, the European Union is reeling from the financial crisis and separatism, and only frivolous Russia invites as many Tajiks as possible. But the state of affairs seems to be wrong only at first glance. If we recall the dreams of the Eurasian Union, cherished by Comrade Putin, then the apparent lightheadedness turns into a formidable project of reuniting the fraternal peoples of the USSR, disunited by the trembling hand of the Maltese commander Yeltsin. While others are being fenced by multi-kilometer fences, scribbled with video cameras and democratically chosen democratically, Russia is looking into a single bright future. And in the journal “Foreign Policy”, which was described above, this very future is already foreseen ...
“Big government. Little brains. Stupid laws "
In Indiana it is forbidden to wash from October to March, and in Florida you can not take a shower naked
There are many stupid laws in Western countries. Some of them became stupid and became ridiculous with time, others were adopted quite recently. Records on the stupidity of the laws beat the United States.
For example, in Indiana smoking take baths from October to March. Men who tend to kiss often do not have the right to wear a mustache here. In 1984, a law was passed in Spade, prohibiting the use of firearms weapon for opening cans. In Indiana, pi is not 3,14, and 4 is also in accordance with the law.
In Texas, you can go barefoot only with a special permit, for which you have to pay 5 dollars. George W. Bush, being the governor of Texas, passed a law in accordance with which the offender is obliged to verbally or in writing to warn the victim of the impending crime - at least one day before it is committed. Yes, by the way, the warning should describe the upcoming crime. Violation of this rule is considered by the court as an aggravating circumstance.
In Florida, citizens do not have the right to take a shower in the nude. In the same state it is forbidden to break more than three plates per day. In Miami, by law, you can not ride bicycles that are not equipped with a sound signal, but the use of sound signals by cyclists is prohibited by other law.
In Arkansas, all voters are criminals. Here, on election day, it is forbidden "to anyone and under any pretext to approach the windows and doors of the polling station closer than 15 meters."
In Fort Madison, Iowa, firefighters are required to conduct an 15-minute workout before each fire exit. In New Orleans, it is forbidden to tie alligators to fire hydrants, and in St. Louis firefighters cannot rescue naked women, as well as women dressed in a bathrobe or nightgown.
In California, animals are forbidden to mate closer than in 500 m from schools, churches and catering facilities. In the same state, the speed limit is set for cars without a driver - 60 mph. In California, it is prohibited to wash used underwear. And in the city of Chico you cannot blow up nuclear devices within the city: this is punishable by a fine of 500 dollars.
In Utah, the law is also "friendly" with nuclear technology: here not prohibited possession of nuclear explosive devices - you can not only use them.
In West Virginia, male citizens are allowed to copulate with any animals whose weight does not exceed 18 kg.
In Clawson (Michigan) you can sleep with pigs, cows, horses, goats and chickens - but only the owners.
In Pennsylvania, when meeting with horse-drawn vehicles, the driver of the car must hide the car under the cover. If the horse is frightened, the owner of the car should disassemble it, and hide the parts in the bushes.
In South Carolina, the owner of a low-traffic vehicle must stop at 30 in front of the intersection, get out of the car, shoot a gun and then continue.
In Florida, a fine or prison threatens those who let out loud winds after six o'clock in the evening.
In Moleine (Illinois), citizens are not allowed to skate on the ice of the city pond ... from 1 June to 31 August.
In iowa kiss can last no more than 5 minutes, and one-handed pianists are required by law to play for free.
In Massachusetts, people at the commemoration can eat no more than three sandwiches.
In New Jersey, it is forbidden to "disapprove" of a police officer.
In Tennessee, women can not drive a car, except when a man is waving a red flag in front of the car, thereby warning pedestrians and drivers about the danger.
In Washington, it is against the law to put a polka dot pattern on the US flag.
In Cleveland (Ohio), women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes: men can see in them a reflection of underwear.
In Klamath Falls (Oregon), it is forbidden to whistle under water, and at the same time ride roller skates ... in public toilets.
In Providence, Rhode Island, in stores smoking To sell a toothbrush and toothpaste to the same buyer on Sundays.
In 2013, in some US states have entered new laws.
In Illinois, Pedo-Santa’s (Santa Clauses with pedophile inclinations) are prohibited. Despite the rapid advancement of tolerance in the United States last year, necrophilia is also banned in Illinois this year.
In Kentucky, citizens can no longer disperse herds of wild pigs. In California, sex with prisoners got into the legal field: from now on, guards have no right to have sex with prisoners. It is also forbidden to shove representatives of non-traditional sexual orientation in the trash can so that they become heterosexual there in the tank.
Here is what they write about it on the American website. "Dumb Laws": “Big Government. Little brains. Stupid laws.
* “No ... This is not Rio de Janeiro. It is much worse ”- the phrase from the movie“ Golden Calf ”
Promotion of deserters in Lithuania
Escaped from the army - got cash
Valiant Lithuanian military personnel who fled from the Soviet Army in March 1990, and then were caught and sentenced to various terms for desertion, will now be rewarded by the Lithuanian authorities. Perhaps, deserters are going to award with high military awards "The sparkling heels of Lithuania" or "Escape in exchange for independence"? .. No. The government of the state that is part of the European Union decided to distribute all sisters of 4000 LTL worth of earrings to the “fighter”. If we take into account that the “fighters” were already encouraged by the Lithuanian leadership in the middle of 90, and then compensation amounted to 3 thousands of litas per one “litas”, then from January 2013's “shortage” of one thousand litas (about 300 euros) will be paid in addition to full compliance with the Lithuanian free legal law.
Well, the support of warriors for independent Lithuania is important at all times. Only because the current fighters of the Lithuanian military units, inspired by the precedent of their "ancestors", can go the same way. And what they say, why are we worse than Algirdas or Vytautas, who waved through the fences of the Soviet military units in 1990? And let's say, and we will wave from the NATO formations! You look, in years through 10-15, they will also give compensation, because Lithuania, like a couple of its Baltic neighbors, is an extremely flexible state: just a little mess, so quickly, to the side of the former opponent ...
Enjoy Your Bath, Latvia!
How Eldar Ryazanov prevented Latvians from becoming Europeans
Europeanization has gone to the fore in the Baltic countries. While the authorities in Lithuania financially encourage deserters, individual politicians in Latvia consider it their duty to protect the Latvian people from (you will be surprised) Soviet propaganda! Yes Yes! Neither more nor less ... The reader will ask: but, excuse me, where did the Soviet propaganda in Latvia of the new time come from? You do not know yet? Then go and ask the ex-diplomat Normunds Vasarins. Mr Vasarins about Soviet propaganda knows everything!
He declares that the Latvian people would long ago have become truly European if they had stopped watching the film “Irony of Fate, or Enjoy Your Bath!” According to Vasarins, this film litters the mindset and clearly prevents the Latvians from breaking their past. The question of whether the Latvians themselves want to break up with this past, Vasarins, is obviously not given.
Let's try to figure out what in the film of the inimitable Eldar Ryazanov prevents Latvians from becoming Europeans. So, in the storyline, Zhenya Lukashin throws his bride Galya. Well, can this confuse the right Latvian? Of course not, because in 1990 Riga nothing prevented finding “Nadia” on the western side, breaking into independence in a foreign European apartment ...
Perhaps, Vasarinshu and his like-minded people does not allow an episode to turn into a bath in Europeans? After all, real Europeans have long ceased to hide their causal places with bath towels before the camera ...
Or maybe Vasarins doesn’t give rest to Hippolyt’s speech about how disgusting your fish is? Apparently, the former employee of the Latvian Foreign Ministry found in the words of the hero of the actor Yury Yakovlev a transparent hint at Latvian sprats ...
In general, after the words of Vasarins, Eldar Ryazanov can sit down at a book entitled: “How I prevented the right Latvians from becoming Europeans.” Eldar Alexandrovich, it will be a bestseller!
Ex-minister at the crossroads
Or maybe to Latvia ...
Apparently, in order not to let the Latvians finally break with Russia, in the press this week there was an entertaining information that former Defense Minister Anatoly Serdyukov asked for a residence permit in this Baltic republic. So far, information about the request of Serdyukov in the Latvian Foreign Ministry has not been confirmed, but some media say that Anatoly Eduardovich has already managed to visit the Baltic shores. Some publications attribute his visit to Latvia to the fact that it is here that the company of his lawyer, Heinrich Padva, “Padva un partneri Baltija” is located. This firm is engaged in rendering services in relation to foreign citizens in terms of obtaining for them a residence permit in Latvia.
While this information is not confirmed and not disproved, it is worth pondering why it is Latvia that Anatoly Eduardovich can choose as his haven. Usually, after all, our compatriots, who are forced to leave high posts against their will, decrease no closer than the British capital.
Perhaps the ex-minister has an irresistible craving for Baltic amber, and, you understand, not to move to the Kaliningrad region. Or maybe the fact is that Anatoly Eduardovich was also tired of seeing the New Year coming under the film “The Irony of Fate”, and he decided to take refuge in a quiet Riga, away from the Russian “bath” in which he and his women's battalion could have something to soap ... Soap with brooms is there, the main thing is that bath attendants should be found ...
And let the pension wait
President extended service life for government officials to 70 years
Russian President Vladimir Putin has decided to start 2013 a year with a gift to all Russian officials who were turned into the word “pension” by the unfriendly. The president decided to put aside all attempts of detractors with one stroke of the pen, signing a bill that from now on any state official can remain in the public service until 70 years (before the 2013 began, the official could remain at his post if the desire arose until 65 years). There is, however, one limitation: the president will take the decision “to leave — not to leave” the official in his post personally. So let the officials try in one format or another not to support the president after such a gift ...
Proceeding from the new law, mathematicians have deduced the following pattern: the closer the age of a state official will be closer to 65 years, the less disagreements this official will have with the general line of the head of state. Well, judge for yourself who is hunting in the prime of bureaucratic forces when families have already managed to make friends with prosecutors, judges, heads of regional departments of the traffic police, heads of real estate control departments, federal inspectors and other "colleagues" to go for a well-deserved rest? That's right: no one! Yes, and to send an official in 65 for years to retire is somehow not human. And where is the honor in respect of highly experienced managers? .. Where is the support of a comfortable old age? ..
In general, thousands of Russian assistants, ministers, deputies, advisers, state secretaries, inspectors and others breathed a sigh of relief. Five years from now it will be possible to serve Mother Russia with faith and righteousness, another five years it will be possible to take care of each individual Russian citizen, from Chukotka to the Baltic shores.
And we, ordinary citizens, fell a stone from the heart. And then, in fact, some kind of anxiety took over the heart. How are they, the poor, in 65 something of their young years will be alone with the pension? But - carried by! Mean tears of joy flow down my cheeks ...
Language confusion in Ukraine
In the beginning was the word ...
At the end of last year and at the beginning of the new year, fraternal Ukraine began to worry about the linguistic features of the national language. As previously reported, one of the deputies of the fairly noisy Svoboda party, by the name of Miroshnichenko, recently used the word “zhidovka” in one of his Internet posts in relation to one of Hollywood actresses of Ukrainian origin. The statements of the nationalist caused a wide discussion in the society, and the Jewish center of Kiev even turned to the Ukrainian Ministry of Justice for clarification about the legality of the use of this term and other terms similar to it. At the end of 2012, the Ukrainian advocates of justice did not see anything reprehensible in the word “Zhidovka”, and a whole number of politicians bluntly stated that this is a quote, “a common word from the Ukrainian language that was used even a couple of centuries ago by classic writers”.
In general, Ukrainian freedom-loving nationalists celebrated a local victory and reaped the benefits of what a wonderful PR campaign for their party was conducted by both the Jewish center of Kiev and a number of media outlets along with the Ministry of Justice of Ukraine.
However, after a short time, the political force finally decided to step in, which seemed to have won the Ukrainian elections to the Verkhovna Rada. Representatives of this political force (the “Party of Regions”) called for a law banning the use of words that would even indirectly call for ethnic hatred and confrontation among the peoples inhabiting Ukraine.
This proposal was made by the representative of the “Party of Regions” MP Kolesnichenko. According to him, the statements that if the words "Jews", "Ukrainians" and others like them used classical literature, for example, in the XIX century, this does not mean that these words are suitable for modern speech. Kolesnichenko decided to hold his own example. He says that in the works of the famous American writer Mark Twain often the word "nigger", but for the use of the same word, obviously derogatory in its meaning and sound, today in the US, you can get a receipt with a written out imposing a fine. This does not mean that Mark Twain in the United States ceased to appreciate.
For the use of this and other similar words by the decision of specially convened commissions, athletes may be disqualified for a long time. Such episodes often occur in various leagues in Europe and the world, and FIFA severely punishes the “linguistically liberated” for a long language.
But then you say FIFA ... Miroshnichenko is not at FIFA ...
However, the incident, the author of which was a nationalist deputy, still did not go unheeded. The case is interested in the European Parliament. Many will say, and where is the separately taken situation in Ukraine and MEPs. But how! Official Kiev, after all, stated more than once that it has a propensity for European integration ... So, the deputies of the European Parliament called on the Verkhovna Rada factions to condemn the representatives of the Svoboda party and stop all political relations with these "party members" until they realize their mistake.
Further, according to the law of the genre, the “unfairly offended” “svobodovtsy” headed by the beacon of the incident, Ms. Fahrion, who had risen to defend her colleague Miroshnichenko, again entered the business. Irina Fahrion, whose national identity is ambiguous, to put it mildly, that same Irina Dmitrievna Fahrion, who at one time (according to her former classmates) was the only member of the CPSU at the faculty, decided to declare that the European Parliament spoke against the Freedom party with "Agent of Moscow". The agent of the Russian special services Fahrion called the European parliamentarians from Bulgaria Christian Vigenin, who made a call to boycott the very existence of the Freedom faction in the Verkhovna Rada.
In general: “and the battle continues again”, and more than one spear will be broken in passionate conversations about which words in the Ukrainian language are correct and which are not.
* * *
The language theme of Ukraine is picked up by another parliamentarian, Alexander Briginets from the Batkivshchyna faction. The same Briginets, who loves to walk in the national Ukrainian shirt, trying with all his might to emphasize what kind of blood flows in his opposition, like the strings of a strained vein.
So, the deputy left, as much as a corporate party of “Batkivshchyna” in protest against the fact that at the corporate party, in addition to the Ukrainian speech, there was also a Russian speech. The deputy was simply outraged! And I wouldn’t be indignant, because Alexander Mikhailovich threw himself at the corporate party not by any rotten Russian rubles out there, but by the very least freely convertible hryvnias honestly earned on the adoption of progressive laws for all Ukrainian people. He threw himself off, put on his shirt, the oseledez famously combed in, but then he remembered that he had not had time to grow his forelock in the right direction, and then - on you! Russian, corrupting the deputy, speech. But the deputy Briginets, apparently, loses his will at the sounds of the Russian language, and the spirit of nationalism in him is shattered ... So 50-year-old boy could not resist. He rushed at full speed to the exit to breathe in the free Kiev air, but on the capital’s Ukrainian streets no-no, but Russian words were heard, from which the deputy and prose writer threw an uncontrollable shiver. It would be better to visit Fahrion - for a cup of gorilka ...
GUAMYUK - it sounds good
Georgia wants to invite South Korea as a partner
For Georgia 2013, the year began with the fact that this country took over the chairmanship of such a union as GUAM (Georgia, Ukraine, Azerbaijan, Moldova) from the hands of Azerbaijan. And as soon as the reins of power turned to official Tbilisi, they immediately heard words about ambitious plans to expand the organization and transform it from a regional petty party, often deciding how to sting Moscow into a truly global institution. Initially, they wanted to give the world level at the expense of Nauru and Tuvalu, but then they remembered in time that these countries recognized the independence of Abkhazia and South Ossetia ... And since the stage was recognized, there should be no place for them in the democratic cohort ...
Then, apparently, they wanted to call for the unification of the United States, but in Washington, Mrs. Clinton searched for a very long time on the map a country called ... GUAM. As a result, I found the island of Guam, read that it was already part of the United States under limited conditions, and was surprised that what the “islanders” still want from the White House ...
In general, with Georgian integration and cartography, everything is not thankful to God: either confusion with the state of Georgia, or with American Guam.
And now decided to go the other way. Maya Panjikidze said that Tbilisi plans to attract South Korea to GUAM in the near future. Why South Korea, Ms. Panjikidze did not clarify, but if Seoul suddenly decides to join the friendly family of real Guamians, the organization will have to be renamed GUAMYUK.
Part II. “And I see in every person what he came out of. And the man came out of the monkey "
Putin is in the lead ... second
Ahead - "nobody"
The foreign policy magazine has pleased the world public with another rating of influence. It would seem that these ratings, lists and portraits on the covers were boring to the public: here and Forbes gave the politicalperson his list, and Time was the person of the year Obama called (having presented the black president with a black background). What did the editors of “Foreign Policy” have been able to distinguish themselves with?
If "Forbes" put Vladimir Putin in the list of the most influential people in the world in third place, then in the "Foreign Policy" they gave the leader of Russia the second place. By "influential", by the way, understood "The ability to make decisions that affect the lives and well-being of a large number of people." And if “Time” excluded from the candidates for the cover of the North Korean atomic comrade Kim Jong-un, although it was he who scored the overwhelming majority of the votes of the readers, then “Foreign Policy”, putting the Russian president in second place, gave first place ... to anyone.
“In the world without heroes, everyone is waiting for someone who can take on all the most difficult and dangerous tasks,” says an explanatory journal. “All other leaders on our list are too concerned with solving local and regional problems.”
Obviously, if Velimir Khlebnikov were alive, he would give him the palm in the “Foreign Policy”. After all, this poet called himself the chairman of the globe.
Rating continues: US Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke, a man who provides the whole world with petrodollars; German Chancellor Angela Merkel, Europe's gluer; US President Barack Obama and others.
The second, almost the first, V. Putin’s place in the magazine explained: “... although he is not as popular as he was used to, and his country does not have such influence as the USSR, no one on the planet concentrated more local and regional power than Putin. "
So that's it, gentlemen and comrades. If the great and mighty V.V.P. had recreated the USSR (say, under the name of the Eurasian Union) and would have become even more popular than it is now, the Foreign Policy magazine would have placed it in the first place.
The geopolitical clue is understood. Thank you, compilers compilers!
Rich French will leave France
And poor Russians will become even poorer
The outflow of rich people from France reached unprecedented proportions. Despite the fact that a week ago the French Constitutional Council объявилthat the 75 percent “tax on the rich”, the profits from which the government hurried to include in the budget law for the 2013 year, “does not respect the equality of (citizens) before state fees” (the reason: the tax is calculated based on the income of one person, and meanwhile he must take into account the earnings of the whole family; moreover, the extremely high tax rate “violates equality in tax legislation”) and therefore will be slowed down, wealthy people continue to move away from France.
While the French government is writing a new edition of the “tax on the rich”, Comrade Depardieu has already received Russian citizenship - personally from President Putin. Film actor сказалthat is not going to change his decision and leave his homeland: “Let them (politicians) say. I do not care. This does not change anything".
Comrade Depardieu, who decided to refuse a French passport, had previously been greatly offended by Prime Minister Jean-Marc Eyro, who call the planned departure of the actor "unworthy."
Then it became known that Depardieu could settle in Belgium, where he bought real estate, in Montenegro or even Russia. Back in mid-December, he сказал: “Putin has already sent me a passport!” It was no joke.
Russian President Vladimir Putin is really сказалthat he is ready to assist the actor in obtaining Russian citizenship: “I understand the feelings of Gerard Depardieu, but I know for sure that we have friendly relations, that he considers himself a Frenchman, he lives it. If Gerard really wants a Russian passport, then we will assume that this issue has already been resolved positively. "
Kirov Governor Nikita Belykh proposed: “We must now register Depardieu in the Sanchur district of the Kirov region”.
Not stayed away from the alleged migration of Depardieu and Ramzan Kadyrov. He said that Grozny was ready to receive an actor.
However, Depardieu prefers simple birch trees to mountain landscapes.
On January 3, comrade Putin signed a decree granting Depardieu Russian citizenship, and in response, the famous actor confessed his love for Russia and the Russian people. In the message of a movie star received on Channel One, says: “I adore your country, Russia, your people, your historyyour writers. I like to make films here, in which I work together with such actors as Vladimir Mashkov. I adore your culture, your way of thinking. My father once was a communist and listened to the radio of Moscow! This is also a part of my culture ... I love your President Vladimir Putin very much, and this is mutual ... Russia is a country of great democracy, this is not a country where a prime minister could call a citizen of his country a miserable person. ” At the same time, Depardieu told me that megacities were alien to him, and he would not live in Moscow. He prefers the Russian village, and he “knows wonderful places”: “For example, there is one place that I love very much. Where the Gosfilmofond is located, under the management of my friend Nikolai Borodachev. There, near the birch forest, I feel great. " The actor added: “Only in such a big country we are never alone, because every tree, every landscape brings us hope. In Russia there is no pettiness, it is full of great feelings. And behind these feelings is hidden great chastity. In your greatness, I never feel lonely. " And he exclaimed: “Slava Rossii !! Spasibo! ”
Another French rich man, pop composer, performer and businessman Jean-Michel Jarre, also decided to leave his homeland. Megalopolises do not frighten off this person. He also seems to like the English fogs: he is going to settle in London.
3 on January стало известноthat the musician is negotiating with the British government. His company, Jarre Technologies, is likely to register now in Tech City, London. This place was created just for businessmen: the residents of Tech City enjoy substantial tax breaks.
Earlier, in September 2012, the billionaire and head of LVMH, Bernard Arno сообщилthat is moving to Belgium.
Infringement of the rich in order to fill the budget and in order to prevent "fiscal cliff" decided to produce in the United States. Here is the January 1 House of Representatives voted for an agreement that increases the tax rate for wealthy Americans.
The agreement finally reached by the Democrats and the Republicans provides for a tax increase for households with income from 450 thousand dollars per year, from 15 to 20%. Individuals who earn more than 400 a thousand dollars a year will also contribute more to the budget. Real estate tax with a value of $ 5 million will increase from 35% to 40%. The payroll tax will increase from 4,2% to 6,4%.
We began to pinch taxpayers in Russia, too, in the very place where citizen Depardieu is trying to enter. True, here, according to a long-standing capitalist tradition (we recall, the French president is a socialist), they once again attacked the poor, so Depardieu may not be afraid of losses.
As is known, at the end of November 2012, Vladimir Putin spoke in favor of canceling the transport tax and replacing this collection with a higher fuel excise. What could this mean in practice? That's right: the tax was not only saved, but also raised in Moscow. Moreover, the increase has affected the owners of low-cost mass machines; Rates for the rich owners of powerful cars remained the same.
The tax increase will be felt primarily by the owners of low-end brands with engines of less than 100 l. p .: almost all models of “Lada”, as well as “Chevrolet Lacetti”, “Renault Logan”, “Daewoo Nexia” and some others. The tax for them will grow from 7 rubles to 12. The rates for the expensive “horses” will remain: owners of cars with a capacity from 200 to 250 l. with. will still pay from 75 to 100 rubles for one unit of power.
However, Putin threatens to impose and rich. President of Russia instructed government to prepare a bill involving a tax increase for the owners of expensive cars. Turning December 12 to the Federal Assembly, V. Putin indicated that the idea of a luxury tax (not only on cars, but also on real estate) should be implemented in the first half of 2013.
Say what you like, but Depardieu will have to continue to ride a scooter in Russia. Sit on Lada - the tax authority will fill up his bills. Sit on the Bentley - and then there is a fault: it’s a luxury, not a means of transportation. It is not surprising that he prefers, firstly, a motor scooter, and secondly, a village and a birch rather than smoked Moscow, where Sobyanin has to pay for the pleasure of standing in traffic jams.
"Awkward Mammals"
They have a cold
According to a long-standing and ineradicable foreign opinion, there is always snow in Russia, and all residents are unhappy. Also, many believe that communism is still being built in Russia. Others object to the latter, at the same time convincing their opponents that the Russians have summer, sometimes it even looks in Siberia. However, this question causes misunderstanding to other foreigners: in the West often confused Siberia with Serbia.
In addition, there is a perception that Russians are rude. Their rudeness is expressed in the inability to say "thank you" and "hello." Cashiers like to take the wallet from the buyer and rummage there.
Hospitality in Russia is also special.
“The Russian will invite you to his home, treat you with pickles, which you, perhaps, did not want, and will treat you with vodka - a glass for a glass, and the answer“ no ”is inappropriate here.”
The Spaniards believe that at minus 25 degrees, Russians warm their hands in refrigerators. Tourists are amazed how in cold girls go in mini-skirts, and the guys walk without gloves and drink beer from cans. One Spaniard argues: what gloves to choose, thin or thick? It would be better to be fat, because he is in Russia, but in them a person becomes “the most awkward mammal.” For example, to write an SMS, gloves must be removed. “More than five phrases in SMS are proof of love” ...
The British believe that escape from the cold should be appropriate nutrition: eat large quantities of lard, potatoes and garlic. Then minus forty is not scary. In the Times you can read that the command of the North fleet Russia ordered additional batches of garlic, onions, lard and brown bread: this will improve the immunity of sailors in the Arctic cold. “I would not want to be on the leeward side,” the journalist notes. And then it reminds that the Russian soldiers won in the snows of Napoleon and Hitler.
Borderless Bulgaria
She is now in Colorado
Before the New Year, Bulgarian President Rosen Plevneliev spoke with congratulations on the background of natural beauty.
As long as he wished the Bulgarians everything very, very much in the coming year and said how beautiful Bulgaria was, the viewers could enjoy the panorama ... The Rocky Mountains in the American state of Colorado. To the credit of the Bulgarians, not all of them took them for the Rhodope mountains.
It revealedthat the clip was assembled by employees of the Bulgarian National Television in dubious co-authorship with the presidential administration. Co-authorship was as follows: BNT journalists offered illustrations, and then the administration approved them. The third co-author, by chance, was the Balkantourist travel site. It was from there that a picture of the mountains was borrowed by journalists. Losers from a travel company probably believed that the photographer captured the ski resort of Pamporovo, located in the Rhodope Mountains.
Perhaps, that glorious leisurely time was irretrievably passed away when reporters, cameramen, photographers rode or flew somewhere, filmed, fiddled with personnel and editing, invented signatures. In the too fast XXI century, there is the Internet, where someone has already photographed something and signed it somehow. And if last year, the American admiral John Natman, retired, pushed the speech to the glory of his native fleet, and the Black Sea ships sailed on the slides behind his back, now the Bulgarian president spoke out for the glory of the American mountains.
Enclosures of the 21st century
Iron Curtain Fashion
Did not have time in mid-December, Greece complete construction the protective wall on the border with Turkey, built to curb illegal immigration, as received the following information: On January 2, a solemn opening ceremony of the security fence on the Israeli-Egyptian border took place. The Jews had to work hard: if the Greek fence stretches for only 11 kilometers, then the Israelis installed an 227 kilometers protection barrier, spending 1,6 billion shekels (about 430 million dollars) on it.
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu сообщил: “We managed to completely stop the flow of foreign citizens illegally crossing the border; we will certainly succeed in our next mission, which is to return tens of thousands of people to the countries of origin.” Last January, an illegal immigrant entered 2153 in Israel, and in December, only 36 people were arrested.
But what has been achieved in Israel will not stop. The next stage of the project will be the construction of several kilometers of barrier structures in the Eilat region.
The Israelis and the Greeks are building walls, the European Union is reeling from the financial crisis and separatism, and only frivolous Russia invites as many Tajiks as possible. But the state of affairs seems to be wrong only at first glance. If we recall the dreams of the Eurasian Union, cherished by Comrade Putin, then the apparent lightheadedness turns into a formidable project of reuniting the fraternal peoples of the USSR, disunited by the trembling hand of the Maltese commander Yeltsin. While others are being fenced by multi-kilometer fences, scribbled with video cameras and democratically chosen democratically, Russia is looking into a single bright future. And in the journal “Foreign Policy”, which was described above, this very future is already foreseen ...
“Big government. Little brains. Stupid laws "
In Indiana it is forbidden to wash from October to March, and in Florida you can not take a shower naked
There are many stupid laws in Western countries. Some of them became stupid and became ridiculous with time, others were adopted quite recently. Records on the stupidity of the laws beat the United States.
For example, in Indiana smoking take baths from October to March. Men who tend to kiss often do not have the right to wear a mustache here. In 1984, a law was passed in Spade, prohibiting the use of firearms weapon for opening cans. In Indiana, pi is not 3,14, and 4 is also in accordance with the law.
In Texas, you can go barefoot only with a special permit, for which you have to pay 5 dollars. George W. Bush, being the governor of Texas, passed a law in accordance with which the offender is obliged to verbally or in writing to warn the victim of the impending crime - at least one day before it is committed. Yes, by the way, the warning should describe the upcoming crime. Violation of this rule is considered by the court as an aggravating circumstance.
In Florida, citizens do not have the right to take a shower in the nude. In the same state it is forbidden to break more than three plates per day. In Miami, by law, you can not ride bicycles that are not equipped with a sound signal, but the use of sound signals by cyclists is prohibited by other law.
In Arkansas, all voters are criminals. Here, on election day, it is forbidden "to anyone and under any pretext to approach the windows and doors of the polling station closer than 15 meters."
In Fort Madison, Iowa, firefighters are required to conduct an 15-minute workout before each fire exit. In New Orleans, it is forbidden to tie alligators to fire hydrants, and in St. Louis firefighters cannot rescue naked women, as well as women dressed in a bathrobe or nightgown.
In California, animals are forbidden to mate closer than in 500 m from schools, churches and catering facilities. In the same state, the speed limit is set for cars without a driver - 60 mph. In California, it is prohibited to wash used underwear. And in the city of Chico you cannot blow up nuclear devices within the city: this is punishable by a fine of 500 dollars.
In Utah, the law is also "friendly" with nuclear technology: here not prohibited possession of nuclear explosive devices - you can not only use them.
In West Virginia, male citizens are allowed to copulate with any animals whose weight does not exceed 18 kg.
In Clawson (Michigan) you can sleep with pigs, cows, horses, goats and chickens - but only the owners.
In Pennsylvania, when meeting with horse-drawn vehicles, the driver of the car must hide the car under the cover. If the horse is frightened, the owner of the car should disassemble it, and hide the parts in the bushes.
In South Carolina, the owner of a low-traffic vehicle must stop at 30 in front of the intersection, get out of the car, shoot a gun and then continue.
In Florida, a fine or prison threatens those who let out loud winds after six o'clock in the evening.
In Moleine (Illinois), citizens are not allowed to skate on the ice of the city pond ... from 1 June to 31 August.
In iowa kiss can last no more than 5 minutes, and one-handed pianists are required by law to play for free.
In Massachusetts, people at the commemoration can eat no more than three sandwiches.
In New Jersey, it is forbidden to "disapprove" of a police officer.
In Tennessee, women can not drive a car, except when a man is waving a red flag in front of the car, thereby warning pedestrians and drivers about the danger.
In Washington, it is against the law to put a polka dot pattern on the US flag.
In Cleveland (Ohio), women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes: men can see in them a reflection of underwear.
In Klamath Falls (Oregon), it is forbidden to whistle under water, and at the same time ride roller skates ... in public toilets.
In Providence, Rhode Island, in stores smoking To sell a toothbrush and toothpaste to the same buyer on Sundays.
In 2013, in some US states have entered new laws.
In Illinois, Pedo-Santa’s (Santa Clauses with pedophile inclinations) are prohibited. Despite the rapid advancement of tolerance in the United States last year, necrophilia is also banned in Illinois this year.
In Kentucky, citizens can no longer disperse herds of wild pigs. In California, sex with prisoners got into the legal field: from now on, guards have no right to have sex with prisoners. It is also forbidden to shove representatives of non-traditional sexual orientation in the trash can so that they become heterosexual there in the tank.
Here is what they write about it on the American website. "Dumb Laws": “Big Government. Little brains. Stupid laws.
* “No ... This is not Rio de Janeiro. It is much worse ”- the phrase from the movie“ Golden Calf ”
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