To use a foreign word when there is a Russian word equivalent to it is to insult both common sense and common taste.
A couple of months ago, I felt like an idiot. Who does not write articles, and sweep the street. And the filthy broom. I was recruited into one Moscow-based media holding - as a columnist for the new magazine. And after a conversation with the director, a nice 20-year-old girl from the personnel service handed me a piece of paper: “This is your job offer. Please sign here. ” Here I played a family tradition. Grandfather in 30-40-e a couple of times inhabited the taiga by order of Comrade Yagoda (hereinafter - Yezhov, Beria). And derived from this experience two postulates. First: Soviet power - [censorship]. Second: do not sign anything without reading.
In this case, the covenant of his grandfather entered into a clear conflict with the victorious march of a new era. Because I could not only read this document, but also understand what kind of animal it is - job offer. “Do not know what it is? - crawled upward brow girls. “How are you going to work with us at such a level of development?”
Go to JOB Offfer
There was nothing to parry. On her side - the secret knowledge of this mysterious concept, and on mine - only 20 years of work in journalism and a doctoral dissertation, and that is still unfinished. And I left, scorching the sun and shame.
Later it turned out that a job offer is a job offer. This was explained to me by an old classmate from among a new generation of managers who make a successful career in a successful corporation. A classmate showed me a flat repaired with a needle: “I have a music center here, a sofa, a microwave oven, and there will be a refrigerator”. “What will stand there?” - I was surprised, believing that a whole truck would not fit into an ordinary Moscow apartment. And renovation does not help. “The refrigerator,” the former fellow student explained patronizingly. - “Is it a refrigerator?” - it finally reached me. “Well, yes, there used to be such a word.”
I approached Vlad and laid a hand on his shoulder. “Listen, old chap,” I began in a penetrating tone. “I’ve come to terms with the fact that you work as a head-up-of-the-office-of… well, you work with someone else.” I resigned that you are engaged in either the preparation of the strap, or the analysis of trends. I resigned that we stopped eating dinner together at our favorite restaurant and now you go exclusively to the “business lunch” and, as a cannibal, eat something raw called “sashimi” there. I’m even ready to tolerate that it’s impossible to smear a sausage with ordinary mustard in your house, and instead you slip green clay under the name of “vasabi”. But the "refrigerator" instead of the refrigerator ... "
And ripped SINNY MY LANGUAGE?
In the previous paragraph, I tried to write the word “whole” instead of “whole truck”. But my computer did not allow it. With a gnashing of teeth, he turned on the automatic translit program and instead of “whole” I got Wtkmysq.
“Or maybe this is the lackluster truth?” I thought wistfully after the fourth attempt. - Maybe the Russian language is time to landfill stories? Well, think, Pushkin, Tolstoy ... Well, think, grandmothers and grandfathers will understand their grandchildren only with a translator ... But then we’ll get everything from the offer and start “arbeiten” by western standards ”.
How innocent now what twenty years ago was called "foreignness" looks like. Then, instead of thinking, we suddenly got a “mentality”, originality and quality began to be called “exclusive”, and the image - “image”. Even the emergence of "franchising" and his older brother "merchandising" is now remembered with emotion. Although then it seemed that these were at least the names of devils from the 9 of Dante's hell.
It turned out that all this was childish prattle on the background of the mighty sashimi ... - ugh! - a tsunami of borrowing that turns today's communication of Russian professionals into a monkey circus.
Recently, one of my editors asked me what the “heavy content” of my article is about. “I do not know,” I replied, discouraged. - Here's an idea like there is, style, they say, is present. Here are the numbers, here are the facts, here are the comments ... And “heavy content” ... I am afraid that I don’t have any at all ... And what, will it have a significant effect on the fee? ”
It turned out strongly: no "heavy content" in any way. And that they all rewriters and copywriters know. With this edition, we also parted. Because I explained that I always considered myself a journalist. Besides, sorry for the atavism, a Russian journalist. Plus - I belong to the generation that was born a little earlier than pagers and Windus98. Like, we were still chasing “rewriters” in the 17 year with “content” on the “news room”.
And ten years ago in one office, having familiarized myself with my biography, they reported that, according to my data, I ideally fit the place of the account director. “Ideally, this is right, this is right about me,” I happily agreed. - And the director to be impressed me. In general, I agree. Just start by explaining one thing to me. What is an account? ”
Now I, like a huge number of inhabitants of Russia, know what an “account” is. I know many other words. But at least kill me - I don’t understand: what content should the Russian words be replaced with anglicisms?
Why should a “personnel officer” be called a “hand-hunter”? Is he getting smarter from this? Or does it work more efficiently? Why, instead of the premium to pay "bonus"? Is he more than a bonus? If more, then I agree .... Not more? And then what? .. And why is the “trend” now called a “trend”? And the brand - "brand"? Which besides the floor of Russia writes through "e" - the brand. Like a memorable typewriter with a Turkish accent at the Horn and Hoof office.
Another word came into use - “outsourced”. Handsomely! In Russian - on a contract. Clear and clear. For example, a plumber works for me on a contract basis, when in the toilet hectares ... the content gets stuck. But I am afraid that if he starts walking to me “on outsourcing”, then I will not manage with a bottle. However. already. Recently wanted to fix the toilet. Call I open the door and stare at the patent leather shoes. And above the boots an intelligent face without the usual blue. “Did you call a faience specialist?” Asked the owner of the person with the shoes. “Chegoy?” - I was slightly taken aback. “Do you change the toilet?” - the plumber inquired coldly, wincing at the client’s incomprehension. ““ I, yes ... but ... this ... where is Uncle Kolya? ”-“ I retired ”, - the shoes proceeded to my class ... sorry,“ Deficit Room ”. “All right!” I understood. - "It will cost me dearly." And for sure - laid out for installation twice the cost of the toilet itself. Although he did not understand what the work of "faience specialist" differs from Uncle Colina.
It turned out that different. For "as you call a yacht, so it will float." For, in the words of the hero Jigarkhanyan in "A dog in the manger": "Count is more expensive!"
For example, it offers you a certain institution to conduct employee training. As it is now accepted - one-day: "we all learned a little, something and somehow." Give a lot for it? Hardly. And if you call it "Coach Session"? Aha “Coach Session” - this is not a sheep that you sneezed, here, of course, you have to shell out. And you can feed the trainees during the break. Need to? You can splash coffee with dryers and call it "break coffee" - then the usual meanie looks stylish and modern.
And for the upgrade, you can take a lot more than for the usual reinstallation of components. And the "developer" looks much more honorable (sorry - more exclusive) than the "developer". Because developers, shelmy, in Russia, from time to time, they stole. And developers - they invest. A completely different color scheme.
What do we have in the bottom line? The pursuit of a foreign woman gradually loses all meaning and turns into an end in itself. And specialists are often required not to have a genuine knowledge of their business, be it the construction of shopping centers or the installation of toilet bowls, but the possession of overseas slang. The main thing - to bring gloss on faience.
But borrowing provide the widest scope for masking your own frivolity and inconsistency. For example, Russian banks, in a race for distributing loans at usurious rates, were preoccupied with a dilemma - whether they were going to bother more customers or check the creditworthiness of borrowers. And they came up with an express check called scoring. It sounds solid. But apart from European practice, where long-term credit histories are behind each client, this very scoring looks simple. In the old days it could be observed at any station. True, under a different name - "thimbles". Because this checking system does not reach the level of at least a crossword puzzle.
The author somehow checked this very “scoring” on himself. In a large shopping center with an interval of five minutes, I applied for the same loan in two branches of the same bank. “Scoring” lasted 20 minutes. And after this time in one department I was informed that “unfortunately, you were denied a loan”, and in the other - they immediately wrote out the required amount. In both cases, the clerks had very important people. It is understandable: “scoring” is a serious matter.
Banks are generally great innovators in the improvement of our wretched language. What is the phrase "visual underwriting". Are you scared? I do not. Because it means that the 20-year-old clerk was trained "by eye" to determine the creditworthiness of borrowers. Like, if the uncle came with mud under his nails, in a torn vest and with a tattoo “Vasya was here” on the left buttock, it is “not our client”. And in general, he is not a developer at all: he lied, a scoundrel, in a questionnaire.
Again, from personal experience: I sit in a bank, fill out an application for a loan with a loan officer. We reach the point "your monthly income." When I put 4,5 thousand dollars, the young clerk smiled indulgently: "Sorry, but I do not believe you." - “Why?” I was sincerely surprised, since my profession is very public and incomes are easily verifiable. “And you have sneakers on,” the “visual underwriter” explained. “I have a salary of 700 dollars, and I buy shoes from Carlo Pasolini too.” Then it was my turn to smile: “My child, believe me, when you earn more than 4 thousand dollars a month, you will probably not care for Carlo Pasolini on your shoes or from Papa Carlo” ...
The borrowing shaft has generated another effect: now the checkmate in the usual Russian office is not a luxury, but a means of communication.
From the prerogatives of the superintendents, the Russian language turned into the language of journalists, financiers, stockbrokers, and so on. and so on Because borrowing deprive us of all the nuances and emotions of the native language. Judge for yourself: everywhere now they establish the "grandfather". So what? How can a Russian person understand that he has already come not “just grandfather-line”, but “very strong grandfather-line”? But if you add something like “Abanamat!” To the word “grandfather”, then it becomes clear: it’s time to hand over the work. Otherwise there will be no bonuses.
EVERY WRITES AS HE HEARS
A year and a half ago I had to go to work at the Chernobyl nuclear power plant. And the most unusual, unnatural, anomalous there did not seem to be a kind of cyclopean sarcophagus over the infamous 4 reactor, not two-meter-long mutated somas in the bypass canals or even towns not abandoned by people in the “exclusion zone”.
On one of the sections of the road, among the coils of barbed wire and concrete blocks of the checkpoint, in which the dosimetrists in yellow jackets “listen” to KamAZ leaving the “zone”, a building with an inscription “Duty free” is clamped. The “zone” crosses the Ukrainian-Belarusian border, and on this site they have erected a duty-free shop. Like, everything is as it should be in the "big world."
Only it is unclear what looks like a bigger mutation.
And here lies the danger. Any psychologist will say that the name of a thing or phenomenon ultimately affects their perception. Broken tongue leads to a broken perception of the world. To the broken mentality, finally, forgive me Dahl.
For example, a friend of mine recently reported that she had “friended” me. “I'm afraid of tickling!” - I warned, just in case, and asked what it was. It turned out that our blogs on the Internet are now connected. And we can "frend" there. That is to be friends. Because she works a lot and has no time to be friends "in real life". Therefore, only "frendit." And for more intimate relationships she has ICQ.
“Friend” I refused. First, too lazy to write “for free”. Secondly, as the poet would say now, “I would be glad to be friends - to be frankly nauseated.” There is something unnatural about it. Like the fashionable rhinestones from Swarovski now: a good name for a fake.
And recently, a couple of my friends - very modern - had a crisis. She works in the back office, he sits in the newsroom. She is engaged in clearing, and he, as the brochures of his firm say, "design & layout." And now in the family - a crisis & scandals. Divorce and maiden name looms. And my friends went to “find themselves”.
“My wife thinks that we need to rebuild our life-style,” Andrei told me. - "She goes to the communication-training and we are engaged in mental sex."
“What are you doing?” I asked. “We are engaged in mental sex,” repeated my friend. - “Yeah, that's for sure!” - “Why are you laughing?” - “It's just that ... you never thought how the phrase“ mental sex ”translates into Russian? ...”.
He thought for about a minute. "So this is well ... it turns out ... that we are busy with the brain ... vom?"
“That's it, Andryush. And at the same time this is the very same communication coach training brand, with which your wife gives three hundred dollars every month. So take money from her, buy flowers and good wine on them, go to the house at home and try to separate the word “mental” from the word “sex”. You can add a beater ... more will be good ... for a life-style.
Curious, but the council acted. Painfully strong impression on my friend made the translation of "mental sex."
WHO AM I? WHERE I AM?
It is funny that the apologists of the “ruskosti” and “the soviettii", who once zealously scourged the "admirers of the West", were in many ways right. "Today he is dancing jazz, and tomorrow he will sell his motherland." We thought it was funny, but it turned out that in Russia it is quite real. And there are a lot of people willing to agree and even join the murder of their native language.
High words? Yes, it is now - outside the "trends". But for some reason I don’t want to go to the “blockbuster” and chew “popcorn” there. I'd rather watch a movie and eat corn. And read at your leisure "House with a mezzanine." Because I am afraid that in the version “Cottage with a penthouse” we will lose something. Something important and necessary. Against the background of which the danger of being a "raw materials appendage" of the West is much less unpleasant. Because there is a danger of being his "mental" appendage.
... I really do not want to seem retrograde. It is clear that language is a living thing and it has to change and absorb a new one. It is clear that once the "tram" and "pavement" seemed outrage over the Russian language. And the author does not call instead of “hello” to speak into the phone: “I heed”. But ... It makes sense, nevertheless, to at least sometimes be set by simple labor - to translate into Russian. To not accidentally spend your life on ... mental sex.
PS Who knows how to disable this damn translit?