Military Review

Christmas adventures of Santa Claus and Snow Maiden in Ukraine

Christmas adventures of Santa Claus and Snow Maiden in Ukraine

Night descended on Moscow, ruby ​​stars flashed brightly over the spiers of the Kremlin

- The road will be difficult. Dangerous. Banned you in Ukraine. You are outlawed there now. Do you understand?
“Of course, I understand,” Father Frost rose and pulled down his fur coat tightly. - Do not worry, Vladimir Vladimirovich. Snow Maiden and I have been in all sorts of trouble. We will cope. Will Russian children in Ukraine New Year's holiday.
... Santa Claus put binoculars to his eyes. The endless plain, as if covered with a white blanket, sparkled under the moonlight. For miles, neither man nor beast.
“Ukraine ...” said Santa Claus. - Well, granddaughter, now look both ways.
He touched the reins and the three without the usual ringing of bells (cut off) quietly moved off.

A kilometer after kilometer, versts per mile remained behind. And suddenly, with wild whistles, an equestrian squad jumped out of the forest and, swinging their sabers, rushed after the sled.
- Cyborgs! - Cried Snow Maiden. - Grandfather! Drive on
- Eh! Gain, valetnye! - Santa Claus shouted, waving the reins, - Do not move, dears! Now you are all reliable!
In a whirlwind of snow dust sleigh raced across the field.
- Grandfather! Overtake!
- To the machine gun!
Snow Maiden rushed to the end of the sleigh, threw back the mat, and took the Maxim handles.
“So, so, so ...” his comrade pounded.
Several cyborgs flew from the horses into the snow.
- Your gut is thin against Father Frost and Snow Maiden! - defiantly shouted the girl and again fell to the machine gun.

But cyborgs did not lag behind. They were divided into two groups and began to skirt the sleigh from both sides.
Only they suddenly stopped abruptly, turned their horses and rode in the opposite direction. Three horsemen descended from the hill towards the sleigh.
- Ooh, oh, basurman! - one of the horsemen shook his fist after the cyborg hiding from his eyes. - Ilovaisk and Debaltseve are not enough for you! Kulikovo battle wanted?

- Thanks you! - Santa Claus wiped his face off his head. “If it were not for you ... Call-magnify something like you?” To thank someone?
- Ilya Muromets, Dobrynya Nikitich and Alyosha Popovich.
- And then how were you?
“So we were also banned.” Partisan little by little. Helping people. Here Nightingale the robber was caught, - Dobrynya jabbed his finger behind his back, where a bow-legged dwarf was stuck to the saddle in yellow-bloky trousers and a long forehead on his shaved head.
- Keep the path far? - asked Ilya.
- To Kiev. New Year's gifts for children we carry.
The warriors looked at each other:
- We will help. We will hold to Kiev. Children will not remain without a New Year's holiday.

... Santa Claus and Snow Maiden rode through the night Kiev. Father Frost stopped a sleigh near a poster hanging on the wall: “Dangerous enemies of Ukraine are being searched for Father Frost and Snow Maiden! Alive or dead! Say no to Santa Claus! Long live Santa Claus! ”
“I know this Santa,” Santa Claus muttered. - Still that hack: neither to cheer children, nor to tell a poem. Only Coca-Cola advertise and can.

The sledge went to Sophia Square.
- What is it, grandfather? - frightened gasped Snow Maiden.
Santa Claus took off his hat and crossed himself.
- This is a Christmas tree, granddaughter.

The Snow Maiden descended from the sled, walked over to the bald forest beauty and pressed her face to the trunk of the tree. A tear rolled down her face.
- What did they do to you, Herods ...
Father Frost came up from behind and touched the Snow Maiden by the shoulder:
“Let's go,” he said sternly. - No time to limp. Children are waiting for us.
************************************************** *
... At the door of the kindergarten, Santa Claus stopped, straightened a bag lying on his shoulder and knocked on the door two times, then three more. The door opened slightly, a woman appeared behind her.
“We are from Uncle Vova,” Father Frost said the password.
- Finally. We already thought you would not come at all ... - the woman opened the door and introduced herself, - Elena Vladimirovna, the teacher.

“December 25, we had a Christmas party,” Elena said in a mournful voice, leading the guests through dark corridors with a candle in her hand.
“Saint Nicholas came to congratulate the children,” she continued. - In camouflage, with one leg and one eye. Matinee began with a moment of silence in memory of the dead heroes of the ATO. Then he told how he fought for the freedom of Ukraine, showed how to disassemble the machine gun and explained the device of the F-1 grenade.
- And the contests? Songs? Poems? Round dance? - surprised Maiden.
- Everything was. He held a contest for the best embroidery, sang "Pliva Kacha Tisini" in memory of the heroes of the Heavenly Hundred, taught the children to dance fighting gopak. Yes, and I read “Green Oak at Lukomorya ...”
“Well, at least it's good,” the Snow Maiden sighed.
“In translation,” the woman finished.

She stopped and began to read:
The edge of the lukomorya is a green oak,
І gold lantsyug on him:
Day І and nich there kit exercises
On lantsyugu tim circle;
Правde pravoruch - spіv start,
Lіvoruch - dogskom homie.
Diva there: lisovik wander there,
Mermaid on gіlі sit ..

“No, stop it,” Father Frost groaned.
- Can you imagine what the children were? The woman whispered bitterly. “One girl later painted this Lukomorye,” Elena handed Santa Claus a piece of paper on which was painted an oak tree and a huge sperm whale with glasses on a tree.
- Who is this? - surprised Santa Claus.
- Whale scientist.

They came to the door, Elena pushed her. Father Frost and Snow Maiden entered the hall filled with light.
- Santa Claus! Maiden! - dozens of children rushed to them, covered them from all sides.
And in the middle of the hall a small, but neat and fluffy Christmas tree glittered with Christmas balls.
And then on “One-two-three, herringbone, burn!” The Christmas garland flashed on the Christmas tree, the children sang “A Christmas tree was born in the forest”, and Santa Claus and Snow Maiden “Tell me, Snow Maiden, where was you?” And of course, there were gifts.

************************************************** **
... When the sun was already rising, on the Russian-Ukrainian border three bogatyrs were bidding farewell to Santa Claus and Snow Maiden.
“Thank you, Ilya, Dobrynya, Alyosha,” Father Frost bowed, and Snow Maiden came up and kissed each of the warriors. And although the kiss of the Snow Maiden was not hot, the faces of all three were flushed.

- Maybe you are with us? Back home? - asked Snow Maiden.
- And who will help the Russian people here? - Alesha was surprised.
- Who is the capital city of Kiev free from basurmans? - asked Dobrynya.

“It's inconvenient to ask ...” Illya hesitated. - But we also sent you a letter via the Internet. Hasn't it come down?
- There was a letter, I remember. There are gifts for you, too, ”said Father Frost, went up to the sledge and raked hay. - Here, everything, as you asked.
- Wow! - escaped from the heroes.

At the bottom of the sleigh lay three AK machine guns and one machine gun.
Well, hold on now, basurman!

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  1. Bastinda
    Bastinda 29 December 2017 07: 00
    That is, Santa Claus, with the Snow Maiden, on the instructions of the GDP smuggled weapons for militants to Ukraine? belay laughing
    1. 210ox
      210ox 29 December 2017 07: 23
      Well, if the three heroes are now called militants in ruins ... So be it .. fool
      Quote: Bastinda
      That is, Santa Claus, with the Snow Maiden, on the instructions of the GDP smuggled weapons for militants to Ukraine? belay laughing
      1. Sergey-svs
        Sergey-svs 29 December 2017 08: 09
        Russian Santa Claus, well, very harsh! lol
        laughing laughing laughing
        1. igor67
          igor67 29 December 2017 14: 27
          Quote: Sergey-svs
          Russian Santa Claus, well, very harsh! lol
          laughing laughing laughing

          very funny, I wrote about three days ago that the great-image of Santa is also revered in the Orthodox Russia St. Nicholas, and you are from Kalash
          1. Mikado
            Mikado 29 December 2017 17: 37
            very funny, I wrote about three days ago that the great-image of Santa is also revered in the Orthodox Russia St. Nicholas, and you are from Kalash

            Igor, in the light of our country's relations with the West, with which Santa Claus is associated, such a picture is normal. At least from the point of view of society. Times are not easy for us now, as you know ... Sincerely, Nikolay hi
            1. Mordvin 3
              Mordvin 3 29 December 2017 19: 49
              Quote: Mikado
              Santa Claus associates

              And I thought he was a Turk. And in general, in vain the nightingale-robber was caught. He is not a robber, but the first traffic cop in Russia. laughing
          2. sabakina
            sabakina 30 December 2017 15: 29
            igor67, remember once and for all, in Russia there is Nikolai the Sainter and Nikolai the Wonderworker. AND EVERYTHING! You still drag St. Valentine!
            1. igor67
              igor67 30 December 2017 16: 41
              Quote: sabakina
              igor67, remember once and for all, in Russia there is Nikolai the Sainter and Nikolai the Wonderworker. AND EVERYTHING! You still drag St. Valentine!

              you killed me, Nicholas the saint and St. Nicholas in your opinion are different saints belay .well be your way
            2. a housewife
              a housewife 3 January 2018 11: 35
              Actually, St. Nicholas - he is alone. Though you name it - a saint or a miracle worker.
          3. a housewife
            a housewife 3 January 2018 11: 34
            Santa Claus and our St. Nicholas - of course, the same person! and this fat man in a red stupid suit and glasses - a Coca-Cola character, advertising, he needs a lot of money! Reindeer feel sorry!
    2. Captain Nemo
      Captain Nemo 29 December 2017 17: 20
      These are not Ukrainian fighters, but Russian vacationers. It’s time to already learn drinks
  2. 210ox
    210ox 29 December 2017 07: 22
    Good postcard at the end of the article!
  3. rotmistr60
    rotmistr60 29 December 2017 07: 25
    So we were also banned. Partisan little by little
    It was written from the heart and as they write before the start of the film - "The plot is based on real events."
  4. BecmepH
    BecmepH 29 December 2017 07: 55
    December 25th we had a Christmas party
    But I thought that soon Ukraine will change its faith and choir and will be baptized from left to right
  5. Loess
    Loess 29 December 2017 08: 17
    Good tale, kind) It’s a pity that almost no tale ...
    1. novel66
      novel66 29 December 2017 09: 24
      and even not funny anymore ....
      1. Masya masya
        Masya masya 1 January 2018 07: 31
        Roman, howdy there love In the new year,....
        and for you...

        smile !!! love
        1. novel66
          novel66 1 January 2018 16: 24
          Thank you, Masenka! love communication with you always raises the mood, with a new year, and so see each other more often in the new year!
          1. Masya masya
            Masya masya 1 January 2018 17: 36
            ------------- wink
  6. BAI
    BAI 29 December 2017 09: 57
    Here is what I still do not understand: Ukrainians rewrote Wikipedia, remade Ilya Muromets into Ukrainian, and now they have refused it. What is the point?
    By the way, why didn't our ubiquitous hackers rewrite Wiki?
    1. Egoza
      Egoza 29 December 2017 10: 24
      So the relics of Ilya Muromets in the Kiev Pechersk Lavra lie, which the Moscow Patriarchate means a separatist, or even a spy!
      1. dSK
        dSK 29 December 2017 12: 18
        Hello, Elena!
        Quote: Egoza
        the relics of Ilya Muromets in the Kiev Pechersk Lavra lie
        They are already 1000 years old, and the "Maidan regime" is the third year.
        A collection of articles by a publicist, researcher and head of the Association of Orthodox Experts has been published Kirill Frolov "The Russian Orthodox Church is the last fortress of historical Russia." The book is dedicated to the centennial of the revival of the Russian Patriarchate. According to Frolov, his collection not only describes all the crimes of the current Kiev regime and Bandera Nazis against the canonical Orthodox Church, but also reveals the purpose of this regime, as well as the Russophobic "project of Ukraine as anti-Russia". "If the Russian Church surrenders, then Russia will not stand." - concludes Frolov. (An article on the TV channel Tsargrad 11: 03., 27.12.17)
  7. Lexus
    Lexus 29 December 2017 12: 21
    Our Santa Claus - such ... Looks, looks ...

    And then he’ll take it and heap "over the wort"
  8. midshipman
    midshipman 29 December 2017 15: 36
    Thanks Klim for the story. I read and remembered. 1965, I was appointed head of the NIS at NII-33. Business trip to Kiev. The end of December, and at the plant "Communist" must fulfill the plan. There was a series of ATC transponders with antennas. Arrived, taught to work on setting up the defendants and returning to the customer, it took only two days. And Kiev met us not with trees, but with pines that were decorated with toys. It was unusual. Upon arrival in Leningrad, he told about this at the research institute and at home to his daughter. I have the honor.
  9. Ryabtsev Grigory Evgenievich
    Ryabtsev Grigory Evgenievich 29 December 2017 17: 33
    Well, okay. Alyosha Popovich “Maxim” just right, but Ilya Muromets and Dobryna Nikitich would have been more suitable for the PKK. They would of them “with a hand” beat the Basurmans in fear.
    1. Mih1974
      Mih1974 29 December 2017 23: 20
      Ilyusha - and KPVT will even pull tongue bully Although who "measured" these heroes can even DShK good
      1. Masya masya
        Masya masya 1 January 2018 08: 14
        Turn around, shoulder! Swing, hand! little will not seem !!!
  10. Klim podkova
    29 December 2017 19: 38
    Thank you all for the comments and happy New Year!
    1. Captain Nemo
      Captain Nemo 30 December 2017 02: 34
      Happy New Year! Good tale
  11. Klaus
    Klaus 30 December 2017 03: 25
    A song of corruption is a tree in Sudislavl, Kostroma region. Six and garland. Severe, but true. Three years ago, the entire Internet laughed. The rest ... I do not even want to swear. Gentlemen: good luck to everyone in the new year. May in the new year we will be a little more responsible, kinder, smarter and more positive. Good luck to everyone and all the best. Holiday greetings!!!
    1. sabakina
      sabakina 30 December 2017 15: 20
      Excuse me, do not enlighten what scandal was in Sudislavl with a Christmas tree? I myself am from Kostroma, but I don’t remember anything like that.
  12. sabakina
    sabakina 30 December 2017 15: 15
    I read it, interesting, thanks for the humor. But it would be more interesting to see in the film, at least a short one, at least in the size of "Wick".
    1. Klim podkova
      30 December 2017 17: 45
      Who will take? There are such?
  13. Masya masya
    Masya masya 1 January 2018 06: 47
    I look, everyone survived after New Year's Eve! Good morning everybody!!!

    1. orphan 63
      orphan 63 2 January 2018 12: 22
      And in Mazepia, they again knocked on the bottom of the bottomless bottom laughing The main enemy is Santa Claus !!!!
  14. kush62
    kush62 1 January 2018 11: 07
    Very cool written, thanks !!!
  15. tuts
    tuts 2 January 2018 14: 08
    Video in topic