Straight Talk with the US Military in Syria

41


“You want to live in peace? Then build democracy and overthrow tyrants, otherwise we will do it for you. Do you know that there are thousands of selected American soldiers in the northern part of Syria and on the border with Jordan? ”



For each of the Syrians, the return of peaceful life means something different, something personal. Vendors of vegetables and fruits can now not be afraid to grow olives and tangerines on their fields, and then sell them in markets and roadside points, the cafe owners opened the doors for many lovers of cardamom coffee, hookahs and mate tea, parents of Syrian children are no longer worried about life the children they sent to school, and their wives calmly accompany their husbands to work ...

For me, the victory of our people over the terrorists means that I can finally begin to travel again to numerous cities and villages of the Arab Republic, where new acquaintances and very interesting meetings will await me.

Having collected my small travel suitcase, charging the phone, which besides its main function also serves as a voice recorder, camera and alarm clock, I confidently went in the direction of the bus to go to Deir ez-Zor. However, as often happens in my life, everything went quite differently as I had planned.

I didn’t have time to light a cigarette when a horny howl of a horn boomed behind my back: my classmate Saleh decided to greet your humble servant with a howl of his car and with joyful cries that woke all the children in the neighborhood. As it turned out, my friend and his wife were traveling in their old jeep to visit friends in Membidzh, they would have to go through a long, hard road that could not do without a talkative conversationalist with a working camera. So instead of the desert Deir ez-Zor, I went to a city in northern Syria.

I will not describe in detail my wanderings for acquaintances and friends of the Saleh family, let me just say that, having agreed on the time and place from which my friend can pick me up, I ran away from the next feast with arak and went sightseeing.
Having agreed with the taxi driver that in a few hundred lire he would take me to the ruins of an ancient city in the area, I went to inspect the ruins of Hierapolis.

However, clearly realizing that the day would be wasted, I went to the nearest coffee shop to drink a vivifying drink. Imagine my surprise when, instead of the Arabic speech, I heard some gentlemen shouting something in English loudly. To be honest, I have long been going to talk with a living American to tell him everything that I think about their country, but that's where you will find them ...

To my surprise, I did not even have to look for a pretext for dating and frank conversation. One of the bodies, cramming a brand-new rifle, ran up to me and, pouring the scent of freshly drunk arak, began to poke a finger at my T-shirt with portraits of the Russian President and our leader Al-Assad. “Why are you wearing photos of tyrants ?! Who are you?! What are you doing here ?! ”- the invader screamed.

What was his surprise when, in his own language, he heard from me that he should go far away to have his stinky hamburgers. Nevertheless, the conflict did not enter the stage of the fight, as the people who came to the rescue in military uniforms and the colleagues of this impudent Yankee dragged him to hell, falling asleep to me with thousands of apologies. However, it was already necessary to stop my stream of abuse, mixed with English, Arabic and even Russian words.

I will try to leave all the emotions in the cafe next to Membidge and give excerpts from our communication, because they have told me a lot of interesting things.

After the mutual stream of abuse had ended, the eldest of Americans addressed me, inviting me to talk about life and politics in a decent Arabic. At this moment, the nature of a journalist struggled in me, who demanded, under any pretext, to find out from the enemy as much information and patriotic feelings as they rushed out to fill the physiognomy of the uninvited stranger. I'm not sure that my professional skills won in this internal confrontation, but I think you will still be interested to learn some details of our conversation.

For some reason, the overseas military man was sure that I personally should have some kind of dislikes towards the Kurdish people, because he started the conversation with this very topic.

“You know, we, too, are already tired of this war, we are tired of living with these Kurds, do you know how much they bore me ?! I hate their way of life, how they live, what they eat and what they breathe. I look forward to when my country succeeds in overthrowing the “tyrant of Assad”, expelling the Russians and Iranians from Syria and establishing real democracy in you, ”the military monologue began.
“And what, that you don't need it ?! We are a more enlightened nation and we know what is needed and what is not! Do you want to live in peace? Then build democracy and overthrow tyrants, otherwise we will do it for you. You know that there are thousands of selected American soldiers in the northern part of Syria and on the border with Jordan! ”- continued“ John ”.
“From where did you get this number ?!” I became interested.
“From George Washington and Monica Lewinsky,” the occupier smiled, “you care why I know this,” the American suddenly snapped.
“It’s just that the president is calling your numbers alone, the representatives of the Pentagon are different — that’s what became interesting,” your humble servant answered.
“Something you are too clever! Are you a Russian spy ?! Or maybe Iranian? ”The occupier told me.
“Actually, Lebanese - I said with a smile - let's do it, I was not going to talk to you. What do you need in my country ?! ”- I am tired of this conversation.
“We are fighting tyrants and terrorists all over the world - like an American robot responded - although it seems to me that Russians, Iranians and Lebanese are even worse than Muslims from Daesh (*). I talked with many bearded men who are considered militants, some even personally coached at the border with Jordan. And that you do not live with them? ”- asked some stupid question,“ John. ”

At that moment, Arabs, Turkmen and someone else began to approach our table. I began to understand that the situation was becoming very tense and it was time to think about how to get out of here. However, the American did not stop.

“You know, my great country has big plans for the whole region. We will establish democracy in your Syria, Iraq, Lebanon, Iran and even Turkey. By the way, have you heard of such a Gulen ?! This is the future Turkish leader, who will be the real democratic head of state, ”said the American.

However, these words have already passed by me, like everything that the occupier said further. Without saying goodbye, I threw three hundred lire for cheap coffee and, wishing this uninvited guest to get out of our country as quickly as possible, I went out into the fresh air. At the exit, there were already some machine gunners in military uniform, several armored vehicles, and behind them an old Opel, produced in 1988 this year.

It was in this car that I saw my salvation. Having jumped onto the passenger seat, I handed over a thousand lire to the driver and asked me to throw it to the center of Membij. Realizing that the entire American army is not chasing us, and cluster bombs are not falling from the sky right now, I tried to understand what it was.

And no reasonable explanation was given to me either during my return to Membidzh or throughout my return trip to Aleppo. Is that a thought, and so understandable to everyone and everyone: “Riyadh, just that you communicated with a real fascist, who is much more dangerous than any ingimasi ...”

* DAISH (ISIL) is a terrorist organization banned in the Russian Federation.
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  1. +12
    December 11 2017
    “You know, my great country has big plans for the whole region. We will establish democracy in your Syria, Iraq, Lebanon, Iran and even Turkey.


    I forgot to include Russia in these plans ...
    as the Americans were cowboys-gopniks, so they remained ... and until someone doesn’t pester them, how did the Vietnamese do this at the time they won’t calm down.
    1. +12
      December 11 2017
      if they ask me what I hate the most in life, I will say, without a shadow of doubt, usa. not a farmer from Idaho, namely the United States politically, a parasite country.
    2. +9
      December 11 2017
      Posted by: Riyad Farid Hijab haha
      From the first lines I realized that this was a joke. All people look like comic book heroes. In general, it’s funny, especially the “conversations” with the Yankees. Respect to the real author
      1. +11
        December 11 2017
        Real author, without any haha
        Riyad Farid Hijab (1987 r.). Born in the Syrian city of Aleppo. He graduated from St. Petersburg State University. In 2017, he returned to Syria, in his native city.
    3. +4
      December 11 2017
      Quote: The same LYOKHA
      and until someone doesn’t torment them, as the Vietnamese did it in due time, they won’t calm down.

      Vietnamese?
      "" Our pilot LiSiTsyn shot down you ""
      It is you, the Vietnamese, lying for nothing
      I clearly heard in the headset:
      "" Kolya, press, and I'll cover! ""
      "" Vanya, beat, and I’ll cover! ""
      Russian ace Ivan knocked me out! laughing
      1. +11
        December 11 2017
        Quote: Sovetskiy
        Russian ace Ivan knocked me out!

        Vietnam war ... Vietnamese buy from the USSR EXPORT MIG-29 version. In the first battle, a Vietnamese pilot shot down 7 American fighters! Journalists surround the Vietnamese and try to understand how he was able to shoot down 7 enemy planes, if he has only 4 missiles on board !? Well, I'm flying and 7 Americans are surrounding me ... Well, I think that it’s an emergency case and I press the red button with both hands! Suddenly I feel like a heavy, hairy hand bangs on my shoulder and I hear: - Come on, move the narrow-eyed monkey ** on ... I’m *** *** ...)))))))))))
        1. 0
          December 11 2017
          Quote: Dead Day
          Suddenly I feel like a heavy, hairy hand bangs on my shoulder and I hear: - Come on, move the narrow-eyed monkey ** on ... I’m *** *** ...)))))))))))

          good good good
          1. +2
            December 11 2017
            Quote: Sovetskiy
            Quote: Dead Day
            Suddenly I feel like a heavy, hairy hand bangs on my shoulder and I hear: - Come on, move the narrow-eyed monkey ** on ... I’m *** *** ...)))))))))))

            good good good
            prose of life ... drinks
  2. 0
    December 11 2017
    Instead of soldiers - zombies. How to fight with such? Perhaps it is necessary to fill in the whole continent with napalm, well, let Greenpeace howl about environmental damage, but the focus of infection will be destroyed .... Ah, yes! Another napalm to the Britons must be left.
  3. 0
    December 11 2017
    Quote: The same LYOKHA
    like Americans were cowboy-gopniks

    Gopniks have rules and concepts. These only benefit. They can promise the mountain, but immediately sell it, as it is profitable.
    1. +4
      December 11 2017
      They can promise the mountain, but immediately sell it, as it is profitable.


      Not a ... you can promise and take it like that ... sucker, he is a sucker.
      How many naive people were so divorced by the Americans ... Hussein, Gaddafi, Milosevic, Yanukovych, etc ... all fell for the hook of the sweet promises of the United States and paid for it having lost everything.
      Now they are also trying to hook Russia on the same hook by launching an attack from the OLYMPIAD ... and our officials have pecked ... fools ... crazy minds.
      One Eun is holding on ... the stubborn man does not want to be strangled in the arms of American democracy ... that's why he is still alive.
      1. +9
        December 11 2017
        Quote: The same LYOKHA
        How many naive people got so divorced

        Are you naive? wink
        Quote: The same LYOKHA
        Hussein, Gaddafi, Milosevic, Yanukovych, etc ... all fell for the hook of US sweet promises

        Something you ... that ... too generalize, IMHO:
        - Hussein - something there with the oil industry (and settlements in euros) was connected in real life, EMNIP. Digging under the dollar, practically
        - Gaddafi decided to play the golden dinar. Digging under the dollar, practically
        - Milosevic - they simply removed a powerful competitor in Europe, splitting Yugoslavia into enclaves. And so Milosevic - just got under the distribution
        - Yanukovych - Ukraine was needed as a battering ram against the Russian Federation. Under Yanyka, this did not work - that’s why Yanyka was removed ...
        Quote: The same LYOKHA
        One Eun holds on ... the stubborn does not want to be strangled in the arms of American democracy ... that's why he is still alive

        Eun, in fact - a barbaric scumbag. And he still holds on:
        - tacit support for China, especially economic
        - on the realization even by the Amertians that a rat, driven into a corner, is mortally dangerous. And Eun is just such a rat, and even with grenade viridin ...
        The world is not easy, but multifaceted (c) laughing
        1. 0
          December 16 2017
          It would be easier with comparisons. The rat sits with you in the largest fortress in the world. Eun, continues the work of his grandfather and father, and quite successfully, once the main "Lemonade Joe" shut up and no longer brandishes a revolver. I don’t know, maybe the Koreans are starving, but I know for sure that they are proud of their country, army and leader.
  4. +7
    December 11 2017
    Oriental tales. The American tells a randomly met local whom he coached ....
    1. +1
      December 11 2017
      Quote: Krasnodar
      Oriental tales. The American tells a randomly met local whom he coached ....

      Well stupid-eee ... fool
    2. 0
      December 12 2017
      Ege, do not tell. Some of the politicians in the United States transparently hinted at links with the Islamic State. “Downed Pilot” McCain was not only openly friends, but he went on a visit. A sort of bravado on the verge of cynicism.
    3. 0
      December 14 2017
      No wonder. This is what you call hutspa. Cynical super impudence, breaking the opponent’s psyche. Part of the psychological warfare. In those conditions, nothing can be done by his Syrian opponent, the recording is not ....
    4. 0
      December 16 2017
      Sheherizada smokes nervously aside.
      He rode, went into the first cafe that came across and met two Merikos at once, fluent in Arabic ... and let him sort things out, then he hopped into a taxi and left without giving his opponents the last word. The hero, who served in Moscow, while the Syrian people fought with the occupiers.
  5. +1
    December 11 2017
    Was the cat with the lamp already? wink
  6. 0
    December 11 2017
    ... all in the spirit of Merikatos’s "democracy" ... even about Gulen spoke out "defender of the interests of shit democracy" ... bully
  7. 0
    December 11 2017
    We are a more enlightened nation and we know what is needed and what is not!

    This phrase contains the whole rotten essence of American democracy.
  8. +1
    December 11 2017
    Surprisingly, why are the Syrians not killing the invaders in batches, as expected? They talk peacefully, and even fear these bandits. To shoot them like mad dogs, then the Yankees will not last long there - more cowardly people than the Anglo-Saxons are hard to find.
  9. +1
    December 11 2017
    Strange ..... somehow everything is not natural! Americans are talking, as if they had "little organs" in their heads instead of brains! A "river" .... like Goebbels’s propaganda: "Rus, give up! It will be milky and eggs for you ..."
  10. +3
    December 11 2017
    Something annoys me in truthfulness. No, not the Yankees' thoughts, everything is clear there. Price level. No, of course, inflation during the war, but not to that level. In 95, when he was on a business trip, a package of milk cost 20-25 lira, simple cakes 5lir (3 or 4 cakes). The course was 1 bucks 44 lira. I received about 15000 lira, a lot of money by local standards, The guys said that local warriors received about 3000.
  11. +1
    December 11 2017
    I liked this moment in the story:
    I confidently went towards the bus to go to Deir ez-Zor.

    the result:
    instead of the desert Deir ez-Zor, I went to a city in northern Syria.

    Imagine our correspondent who was going to Kazan, but got to Petrozavodsk!
    Oh these arabs laughing
    1. jjj
      +1
      December 12 2017
      It didn’t. Then the editors sent the money back
      1. 0
        December 12 2017
        Quote: jjj
        It didn’t. Then the editors sent the money back

        I believe, but in order to do this on my own initiative, I have to try! And then a classmate with his wife, who - "can not do without a talkative interlocutor with a working camera", go to friends - the choice in their favor is obvious! wassat
  12. +5
    December 11 2017
    Again colorful patriotic cranberries. If the Americans were as they are depicted in our fairy tales, they would not be the only superpower. The American instructor dragged his drunken colleague and entered into an argument, and even such an "intellectual" one. but ours didn’t let us down. The stupid Yankees immediately told everything and all of them framed themselves. In theory, the Arabs standing around should have met his glory with an disapproving hum and he should have shamefully retired to the whistle of an indignant crowd, and the right boys tossed his jeep with a camel droppings.
    1. 0
      December 11 2017
      Quote: Petrik66
      but ours didn’t let us down


      So the local journalist wrote an article.
      1. 0
        December 12 2017
        Well, ours is not Igilovets
    2. +2
      December 12 2017
      Everything in the story is cardboard. Judging by the fact that this author gives out a lot of the same type of “sketches” (whoever wants to find it on the net), designed for the very unpretentious taste of an audience that is not prone to critical assessment of content, it can generally be anyone. And not even a Syrian. And some Ivan Segeevich from Voronezh or Lyudmila Vladimirovna from St. Petersburg))
  13. +4
    December 11 2017
    It would be better if Riyadh wrote how people live - both with food, with work, etc.
    1. +1
      December 11 2017
      How can people live in a war-ravaged country? The question is rhetorical. Poor live. But they do not lose faith in the homeland. With the products, too, it's clear. Work - start and finish, the whole country is in ruins. And what? No one gives up. Our people are there, our ...
  14. 0
    December 11 2017
    "Riyadh, you just talked with a real fascist, who is much more dangerous than any ingimashi ..."

    And note - this was said by the Arab, a resident of the same region for which the Yankees have big plans.
    1. 0
      February 3 2018
      Well, do not Syrians know the Nazis in person.
  15. 0
    December 11 2017
    the Yankees are arrogant like all Anglo-Saxons, but stupid, they think to themselves that they are the best tough guys, but in reality ... they understand only a good bashing
  16. +1
    December 11 2017
    Maybe he would take it as a joke, but ...
    In 2002, in Pristina (he took part in a peacekeeping mission) from a conversation with one of the American advisers: "... Russian, as you don’t understand! America is the only country in the world that the Lord God instructed to put things in order on this ... ( fucking) planet. " I felt sad after such speeches. Somewhere I've heard that before.
  17. +5
    December 11 2017
    True or not written - Yankee Go Home !!!
  18. 0
    December 12 2017
    Columbus is to blame for everything: that he discovered America, and that he suggested that the "crowned spirits" fuse a criminal element to the newly discovered lands (so that the rest of the subjects would live quietly), and yet everything is as simple as possible: "... what seed is and a tribe .... ", convicts and bandits have descendants of the same bandits!
  19. 0
    December 12 2017
    By the way, have you heard of such a Gulen ?! This is the future Turkish leader.

    It would be funny ...
  20. 0
    December 14 2017
    Quote: Petrik66
    Again colorful patriotic cranberries

    after the author wrote:
    T-shirt with portraits of the Russian president

    it became clear that the election campaign had begun ...
    In the next article of the author, the negro of advanced years will think aloud about his happy childhood during the years of eternal rule
    Russian president

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